Posts Tagged ‘nonverbal autism’
Some Days I Dwell…
My kid is awesome. He is seven. He also has nonverbal autism. And even though he may never do the things typical kids do or even meet typical milestones…we are okay. He is amazing in his own way. I will give him his best life. And as his mother, I refuse to let myself dwell on the hard parts. The sadness. The things he will never do. It’s not healthy. It’s not who I am. And honestly, it’s just too sad. So, I use my energy to focus on the…
Read MoreWithout Autism…
This weekend my son Cooper is spending time with his grandparents. He is getting spoiled, doted on, and loved in that special way only grandparents can do. We needed this break. We just welcomed a new baby into our world. Our five year old Sawyer needed a break. Mom and dad needed it. Cooper needed it. Within 30 minutes of dad dropping him off, I let out the breath I had been holding. The breath I have to hold when I have Cooper. The breath I often don’t know I…
Read MoreA Mile, A Marathon and A Tour Guide
Every once in a while, somewhere out in public, Noah will scream or screech with delight in a place he loves. He can’t help it! He has autism and he’s non verbal. It’s how he tells me he’s happy. However, sometimes it’s at a place like the grocery store or Lowe’s where it echoes across the whole store. That’s when I get a few different kinds of looks. Sometimes I get the look of pity which is unnecessary but at least has good intentions or I’ll get the ‘I get…
Read MoreA Day in the Life of Brayden
As the days tick down and school is about to begin I can feel the anxiety starting to climb at our house. When I was growing up I remember back to school as a glorious time. I remember going on a shopping trip to Mall of America or the local mall. We would spend the day laughing, wandering, and occasionally picking up a new pair of jeans or a needed pair of tennis shoes. It was never about the stuff. It was about spending quality time with your mom. Now…
Read MoreI Thought I Heard my Nonverbal Son Call for Mommy
I can count on one hand all the times that I have dreamt of Zachary talking in my dreams. You would think since my son is four years old and has nonverbal autism that I would be constantly dreaming of his little voice. At this point I think I subconsciously put a wall up in that area. Those dreams are so vivid, so beautiful, and feel so real. As I start to wake up from those dreams I sense myself being so unbelievably happy, and then I become fully awake…
Read MoreLiving the Unique Autism Life
It is really scary for me to share my experiences with Autism. I have been living this ‘unique Autism life’ for over 18 years; and I’ve received everything from pity, to criticism, to compassion, to hatred because of my children. I really don’t want any of those feelings. I just want people to enjoy my children for who they are, and see the imperfect blessings they bring. So, it’s with trepidation that I put this out there…to share my little piece of what it’s like. Not just the physical ‘alone’,…
Read MoreLove Needs No Words
“Don’t worry Sadie, you can hold your ears, I’ll always be here to help you.” These were the words I overheard my five year old Max say to Sadie as I was walking past the bathroom. She was holding her ears and needed help with her pants, without hesitation Max helped her and continued on giving her step by step instructions on how to wash her hands. He’s the brother that never wants to see her upset, he’ll step in to tickle her or make her laugh until she’s forgotten…
Read MoreSpecial Needs Parenting Under a Microscope
You know what I find to be the hardest part of taking my severely autistic son out in public…And it’s not what you think. It’s not the screaming. Or the meltdowns. Or the running or chasing. Or his anxiety. Or managing my stress on top of his. It’s doing it all under a microscope. The curious stares. The people. The knowing how loud my son is. Knowing what a scene we are indeed making. The praying that nothing really bad happens. The hyper awareness that is needed. The worry. It’s…
Read MoreMedical Cannabis Update-Week Five
I promised I would give a weekly update on our journey with medical cannabis for our severely autistic son. We are over a month in! We’ve seen amazing, huge, gigantic, breakthroughs. I am so excited to tell you all of them. In week one we saw a reduction in anxiety. In week two we saw improved engagement with his surroundings. In week three Cooper began joining our family in the living room, during meals and in the evenings. Jamie and I learned what it was like to sit down. To…
Read MoreYou are Not Lesser of a Mom (VIDEO)
I want to tell you about a feeling that I had for years. A feeling that still creeps up now and then if I let it. It’s the feeling that I am lesser of a mother because my child isn’t typical. It’s that feeling of missing out. It started when my son was very young. Right as it started to get really, really hard. I’m not entirely sure what made me feel that way. Maybe it was society telling me what a mother son relationship ‘should’ be like. Maybe it…
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