To My Husband Who Chose To Stay

To my husband who chose to stay: That sounds so ridiculous to say out loud. Some people are currently scratching their heads because why would I say that? I say it because it’s true. Thank you for loving me when the diagnosis of autism consumed me and changed who I was. I was no longer in my mid-twenties trying to figure out how to be a first time mom. I was an autism mom and services for our son was my only priority. We said good-bye to date nights, weekend…

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Love and Marriage and Our Son

I have been married for twenty-one years. My husband Joe and I have five kids. Our second son has autism. He is fifteen. Now, I may not know much, but I do know children exert an extraordinary amount of pressure upon a marriage. They like teeny-tiny constriction workers, yielding jackhammers If you add one in who never sleeps, smears soap on the walls, and screams all day, well, that’s when things get really interesting. You is righteous. You are never home on time. You have to take care of the…

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Our Life is No Different Than Yours

Our life is no different than yours. Not really. I have three boys. One is 8. He doesn’t say much. But he’s always listening. He hears everything. One is six. He never stops talking. He seems to never be listening. Not ever. And the baby, well, he never stops moving. He really loves kids. And fly swatters. And crackers. Our house is loud. And so cluttered. Our toilets all need to be scrubbed. Every counter seems to be sticky. We can’t keep up with the dishes. We start the dryer…

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I’m Thankful for the Way You Take Care of Us

Meet Ted. His name suggests exactly what you’d think it does. A simple guy. A good ole boy. A guy who can fix your brakes or loan you his trailer. A guy who chops wood and knows how to do drywall. A guy whose humor is subtle, but hysterical if you catch it. A guy who loves any meal you cook for him. A guy who loves to hunt, but rarely gets to go. A guy with a strong handshake and even stronger integrity. A quiet guy, but great conversationalist.…

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A Real Tinder Profile

When we are younger, dating and know everything, we are looking for certain things in a partner. Obviously, someone we are sexually attracted too. Someone with a good sense of humor. Similar interests. A good job. Shared values. Twenty-somethings don’t think about 15 years down the line. Babies, stress, snoring, weight gain, a midlife crisis, money struggles and literally not one second to think, sit or relax. I have to laugh at what a good husband is to me now, after three kids, a mortgage, and nonstop chaos. You wouldn’t…

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A Letter to my Autistic Husband

Dear David, I’m writing this letter to you in a public forum for two reasons. First, I want to shout from the rooftops just how amazing, wonderful, loving, kind and funny a husband I have.  Second, because some people have a very narrow view of what autism is, and I’d like to correct a few misconceptions. You came into my life 18 years ago and immediately won my heart by making me laugh so hard I nearly fell out of my chair!  I knew you were different from the first…

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What if you have a Child with Special Needs?

We were married in the Lutheran faith and had to give up our precious weekend to attend a weekend of pre-marital counseling sessions. It was long and seemed completely unnecessary because we were madly in love. The class was centered on ‘deep’ questions that prompted discussion between couples. How would you handle a partner with an addiction? Or a partner that lies? A partner who gambles? We obviously didn’t have those problems since we were best friends so we breezed through. Oh the arrogance of twenty-something kids. Jamie and I…

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To My Husband this Father’s Day

You are my rock. You are the reason I’m able to manage all we have endured together. You’ve never left my side no matter what the experience. We are one month shy of our 5-year wedding anniversary, yet we’ve been through so much in just our first few years of marriage. A conversion of faith that would eventually guide us in the midst of chaos. Hardship from having three kids in the NICU. Countless surgeries, procedures, and doctor appointments for our three little ones. Diagnoses like autism, sensory processing disorder,…

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The Moment Autism Changed Me

To My Dear Husband, I vividly remember our first date. I was 16 years old and you picked me up in a parking lot across the street from my friend’s house so my parents wouldn’t know. Let’s be honest, it was a disaster. We went to the movie theater and I paid for our tickets, you awkwardly put your arm around my shoulder for 5 minutes near the end of the movie and we did not speak to each other for years. You went on to have a beautiful daughter,…

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Amy Schumer on Husband’s Autism Diagnosis

Getty Images for Tony Awards Pro

Comedy star Amy Schumer is opening up about why she revealed her husband’s autism on her new Netflix special, saying the couple hopes this encourages people concerned about stigma to seek diagnosis. She said, “There are a lot of people with autism who go undiagnosed when I think their life could be better if they got those tools.” First, I think it’s amazing when autism makes the national news. And I don’t mean just CNN. I mean mainstream media. This story is all over the news and social media. I’ve…

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