To The Friend Who Gets It

A friend reminds you of your worth.  She knows when you’ve had the max you can take and knows that you can’t go out for a drink, so she comes to you with all the ingredients for a fine Bloody Mary. A friend is one who doesn’t just talk. She doesn’t say a word, she just shows up.  She attends your daughters IEP because she knows her support will give you strength to be Mama Bear. She shows up to your chaotic life and takes your kid to a soccer…

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Wanted: That Mom Friend

I’m looking for a mom friend. You know, ‘that’ mom friend. That friend that needs no explanation because our worlds twirl within the same circles. The one who I can call at any hour of the night, because both of our families are wide awake anyhow. The one who puts the same amount of miles on her car, from searching every store, for that specific package of fruit snacks, or brand of pizza, or shape of chicken nugget. The mom friend that is fluent in a familiar list of prescribed…

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Baby Shower

When I look at these photos from my baby shower I see so many amazing things. I see a group of women brought together by a little boy who has no idea the positive impact he is having on the world. I see women supporting women. I see strength. I see the loneliness I felt just a few years prior. I see lifelong friendships. And I see our kids growing up together. We have been brought together by our children and autism and I couldn’t be more thankful. Thank you…

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Having a Tribe Can Make All the Difference

“Build your tribe. Find your village. You’re going to need them.” I remember looking up at our pediatrician through tears as she said those words to me shortly after delivering my son’s Autism diagnosis. She explained how dynamic and changing our lives would be and that we would need to find others who understood. The gravity of those words didn’t quite register with me at first. I mean, I had friends. I had family. What did she mean I needed others? At first, I was lost in my grief for…

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Why Special Needs Mom’s Need to Find Their Tribe

I remember being in college and hanging out with friends all the time. You had your education friends, the friends you made during Freshman orientation. If someone was walking down the hall talking about Skyline Chili or LaRosa’s Pizza you’d hop in the car with them and go. Those were the good old days. The fun days. Then you get married and have kids and all of sudden your life is so unrecognizable and somehow during labor you forget how to make friends. It becomes this awkward thing. Where you…

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A Letter to the Struggling Autism Mama

I see you, and I feel your heartache. I understand that every single day is a back and forth balance of finding the joy and grieving the life you thought your child would have. Your days are now filled with therapy appointments, IEP meetings, arguments with insurance and sleep deprivation. You are now leading a team of educators and therapists that you didn’t sign up for, or ask to be a part of. But you know it has to be done. Own your seat at that table, you are important.…

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Find Your Tribe

A few weeks ago, I posted a blog about exactly what to do after you have learned of your child’s diagnosis, you can find that post here. It’s a bit overwhelming and once you pull yourself out from behind the curtain of sleep deprivation and emotional exhaustion, you need to do something very important. Find Your Tribe. At first, your friends and family will be there. Emphatically. Supporting you. Hanging on your every word and asking how they can be there for you. You may have friends that will want to…

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Finding The Ones Who Understand

When I was pregnant for the first time, so were a bunch of my friends. We had plans. Our kids were going to be best friends and grow up together. We would watch them meet milestones together and bring them to the park for playdates. It was going to be the, let’s be honest, the somewhat unrealistic expectation most first time moms have, but I have seen it happen, the pictures posted online to prove it. Some best friends do get to extend those deep connections to their children and…

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