Posts Tagged ‘autism’
Progress not Perfection
From the second our babies are born we are teaching them independence. The goal is to grow up…right? And thankfully, most skills are just learned through observation. They don’t need to be taught. Especially if you have an older sibling. They see it done a few times and before you know it your toddler is using a spoon or sitting on the toilet. With this amazing kid it was different. Skills didn’t come naturally. Anything new was resisted. There was no…’I’ll do it myself.’ No independence. At age 8 we…
Read MoreMoms, You are Good Enough
I never realized how much I wanted to be a mother until I was told I couldn’t. Until I was told my body would fail me. My body wasn’t, “good enough” to do what a woman’s body was, “supposed to.” I never knew how much I wanted to be a mom until that honor was taken away from me. After 2 ½ beautiful months he left our home returning to his teenager mother who changed her mind. One final signature, one last document, a teenage mother’s changed mind, and my days…
Read MoreTo the Special Needs Mom on Mother’s Day
I am thinking about you today. I want you to know that everything you do matters. When you crawl into bed at night, aching from your temples to your toes, know that you have done enough. There may have been no progress made with toileting, feeding therapy or communication today and that is okay. Your child is safe and so loved. The weight of hectic schedules, parent trainings, OT, PT and visits with every other MD in-between can feel suffocating. The research, the meltdowns, the battles over chicken nugget brands…
Read MoreJust Another Day to Autism
Mother’s Day… Oddly, each year it only gets harder. I knew my first Mother’s Day that something wasn’t quite right. I knew it deep in my gut—or should I say soul? I had dreamed of being a Mother and I had a vision of how it would be with my child. Now I see those visions—my visions—through others on Social Media. As a special needs parent, we miss out on so much. It seems to be the most typical things most take for granted that hurt the most. To be…
Read MoreMy Most Precious Moment
It’s been 525,600 minutes since we last celebrated Mother’s Day. Has your child progressed as far as you hoped he would? Has he reached the goals you set for him? For those who have…congratulations! For those who haven’t, know that you are not alone. I remember a year when my daughter, Lizzie, came nowhere near reaching the goals I had set for her. Lizzie was diagnosed with autism days after her second birthday. She had every red flag…no functional language, no joint attention, no ability to communicate, and no awareness…
Read MoreGreat Wolf Lodge Cares
A few weeks ago our family visited The Great Wolf Lodge in Bloomington Minnesota. This was a big thing for our family. Huge actually. Just like most kids, our boys love swimming. They love lazy rivers and wave pools. They love going places. And they love the idea of staying in hotels. But, and it’s a huge but, it’s not that easy for our family. Our oldest has autism. And while he loves to swim, it’s often overwhelming for him. Waterparks are crowded and loud. There is a lot of…
Read MoreThis World Needed You
This year, we stand on the edge of the end of your 5th year, right on the precipice of you turning 6. It has been over 3 years since I last heard your voice elicit words spoken from your heart as you yelled goodbye to your beloved garbage trucks as they turned out of our neighborhood out of sight. Now, you rarely glance up to watch the garbage trucks when they come by. Most days, I really cannot believe we are here…I thought we would have heard those words again…
Read MoreFalling in Love with Reality
To the boy that grew only in my heart, I still think about you sometimes. Not as often as I did in the beginning. But sometimes when things get lonely and dark you wander into my mind. You stand there smiling at me. Sometimes you talk to me and tell me all the things you love. Sometimes you show me your favorite toys. Sometimes you teach your little brother things and I watch him look up to you in awe as you take care of him. Sometimes you play with…
Read MoreMy Son, You are Different
My son, you are different. Different in the most best possible way. I realized that today. You are not like the other kids. And there is absolutely nothing wrong with that. Not in anyway. You are the brave one. Because you have no fear about being exactly who you are. We were at the park. The cool one in the neighborhood. At least that’s what your brother says. We finally convinced you to walk over there. You were scared at first. We had to make some new turns. Go farther…
Read MoreMissing Out
You’re missing out. Parents of special needs kids say this in their head all the time. At least I do. You’re missing out on having her read all but a few words. You’re missing out on giggly girl sleepovers. You’re missing out on having her on middle school honor roll. You’re missing out on her excitement from passing the driver’s test. Prom. College, moving out. Wedding. Children. So many things to feel bad about missing out on. Milestones and rites of passage that just don’t apply in your situation. But…
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