Posts Tagged ‘autism and nonverbal’
I Pray for You
My sweet boy, In the beginning, back when I found out I was pregnant with you, I prayed for you to be healthy. When you were born, I prayed for you to breathe. To nurse. To sleep. As you grew from a nugget to a meatball, I prayed for you to roll over, sit up, crawl, and walk. Then I prayed for you to speak. To play. To see other people. To let me touch you. To embrace the world. I prayed for you to be like the other kids…
Read MoreThey Need to Communicate
I read a comment on the internet yesterday that said teaching autistic children to communicate is abuse. The commenter said that if a child is unable to communicate than teaching them is abuse. Let that sink in for a second. Now a second more. I let it sink in for the last 24 hours. I kept thinking I would find some pearl of wisdom in the persons way of thinking. But I haven’t. Not yet anyways. Because I want to learn. I want to do what’s best for my son.…
Read MoreIs He Happy?
Today was a day. Long. Hot. A bit boring. Fun at times. The kids are figuring out this summer vacation thing. So are mom and dad. Schedule changes are tough I tell ya. It takes time to settle in. To figure out how to slow down. I watched my two oldest, Sawyer and Cooper, swim for over an hour. At first, just Cooper wanted to swim. It’s his most favorite activity ever. He’s a fish in the water. An autistic adult told me once that being under water is the…
Read MoreA Truth to be Accepted
Sometimes we wonder why. Why did this thing happen to me? Why my spouse or parent or child or friend? Why us? Why not those other people? I think that’s normal…to wonder why. And to want answers. If I’ve learned anything over my 39 years, it’s that there isn’t always a why. Or a black and white definitive answer as to why things happen. And that’s the hardest part. It’s like a wrestling match with your heart and mind and logic and emotions. We want answers. We want accountability. But…
Read MoreThis is Our Autism
Some kids never follow the beaten path… Whether it’s from birth or from a later date, some kids don’t follow the beaten path. They don’t meet milestones on time. They don’t follow the norm. They don’t do what every other kids is seemingly doing. My son Cooper is that way. He takes note of what he is ‘supposed’ to do and does the opposite. Some people call him a free spirit. Some call him stubborn. Even challenging. Autistic, disabled, special needs…all words thrown in. It’s hard sometimes. I won’t lie…
Read MoreRemembering the Beginning
We used to not be able to have lamps in our home. That sentence right there. That’s the one that people always comment on when I say it during interviews. Then they chuckle when I follow it up with how for weeks we had to eat with headlamps on. In the dark. At our kitchen table. I’m sharing this here because my son Cooper just had one of his best weekends ever. And I spent a little time last night looking at old photos and remembering the beginning of our…
Read MoreDiscover the Gift
If you’ve never met anyone like my son, you’re missing out. Discover the gift of knowing someone who has special needs or a disability or who is different. Do it today. They will open your eyes to a whole other world. One that looks like your own but isn’t. I promise you the word pity will vanish from your vocabulary too. And it will be exchanged with joy, resilience, and triumph. Get out of your bubble. Your comfort zone. Meet new people. See others unlike yourself. Different can feel scary.…
Read MoreHe was Born Autistic
People ask me all the time about my son’s first signs of autism. For some children, it’s textbook. A quick google search returns a lack of or loss of words, struggles with eye contact, or lack of imaginative play. For other kids, the diagnosis doesn’t come so easy. It’s more complicated. Pages full of questions and checkboxes that parents agonize over. Waiting. Worrying. Wondering. I call it the in between space. For us, our sweet boy was born autistic. From the second he was placed in my arms I knew.…
Read MoreGrief is Love
Having a child with a disability is a million things. It’s unbelievable joy. It’s seeing and experiencing every single milestone. It’s happiness. It’s feeling the gut wrenching pain of watching them suffer. It’s finding your voice of advocacy. It’s seeing firsthand that bullying exists. It’s seeing resilience. It’s being turned inside out. It’s carrying a weight that most cannot see. It’s wanting to fight. And run. And hurt. And protect. And scream. It’s a million things. It’s so much. So much more. And tonight. For me. It was being 11…
Read MoreListening With More Than Your Ears
Yesterday, for the first time ever, my 11 year old son was able to tell me that his ear hurt. We were in the drive thru for Starbucks, our happy place. He was pointing out the address numbers on the doors of the shops. 100. 200. 300. He adores numbers. As we communicated about the numbers, me talking and him using his fingers and sounds, his little brother filled in the gaps. ‘Cooper is 11. I’m 3. Sawyer is 9. Mom is…how old are you mom? Maybe 100?’ And then…
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