Special Needs Parenting
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Hey all! Many of you ask how I jumped into the advocacy world. How did I start? Well, it’s quite simple. As my autistic son got older I started to see all the things that were wrong with the way people with disabilities were and are treated. It didn’t seem right. It didn’t seem fair. So, I started openly talking about things like Medicaid, inclusion, and disability awareness. I want you to know that when my son was diagnosed with autism I remember specifically thinking…I don’t want to carry the…
Read More9 Big Mistakes Parents of Autistic Children Can Avoid
I often think of my son’s autism as a journey. A journey that not only he is on, but our family as well. A journey with many, many challenges. And holes and cliffs. And of course it’s slippery. The hills have jagged rocks and most of the time I feel like I am hanging on for dear life. There is no safety harness or map. I typically don’t know if I am even going in the right direction. And perhaps at times I fear that I might be going backwards.…
Read MoreWill It Always Be This Hard?
I read a blog post today. It was written by a super exhausted mama for the super exhausted mama. Which obviously caught my eye. That’s me. I work full time. Two kids. One with autism. Three dogs. Home owner. Friend. Daughter. Spouse. I spend my days sharing autism, advocating, attempting to have a social life, trying to drink enough water, playing with my kids, exercising, fighting with Cooper over eating and communication, cooking dinner, cleaning my house, wishing I could walk my dogs, get a good night sleep and pee…
Read MoreDoes Parenting A Child With Special Needs Get Easier As They Age?
Have you ever wondered that? I used to all the time. I would be at a particularly low point in our Autism journey and I would ask that question to my mom or a friend or a doctor. And no one would tell me the truth. I just needed to hear if it was going to get easier or get harder. I needed an honest answer. The problem was I was asking the wrong people. I’m not surprised I get asked this question every day by parents of newly diagnosed…
Read MoreA Conversation with a Stranger
Last week I helped a father while his daughter was in the middle of an autistic meltdown. We’ve all been there. As the parent your focus is safety and getting through the meltdown. This man needed an extra pair of hands. And I had no problem offering mine. After she calmed down we had a quick conversation that has stuck with me. Without knowing each other, or saying much more than an introduction, he said, ‘I didn’t know how hard it was going to be. And I really didn’t know…
Read MoreBehaviors, Business, Physical Care and Emotions
I’ve been doing the special needs parenting thing for seven years now. I’ve learned so much about myself, my son, autism, friends, family and life in general. Having a child with a disability changes everything. I’ve learned about exhausting, relentless behaviors. I’ve learned how demanding physical care can be. I’ve completed evaluations, made phone calls, and sent emails. I’ve felt the unique, confusing heartbreak that goes into raising a child with a disability. Some parts are great. I see beauty now that I never knew existed. Some parts are heartbreaking.…
Read MoreWhen the Super Mom Gets Depressed
There is a stigma around depression. A really, really ugly one. And I think there’s especially a stigma around mothers who have depression. If you’re depressed, you’re weak. Broken. You are medicated. You cry a lot. You sleep a lot. This isn’t true. At least not for me. I have a wonderful life. Two beautiful children. Three wild dogs. A wonderful and supportive partner. A beautiful home. I’m not weak. I am strong. I am freakishly independent. And I am not broken…at least not completely. I am not medicated. And on…
Read MoreI Will Sit With You In The Dark
“When you can’t look on the bright side, I will sit with you in the dark.” Alice in Wonderland Hearing that your child has autism, or any neurological disorder, is so unbelievably scary. Maybe you knew deep down. Or maybe you were oblivious. It honestly doesn’t matter because in an instant everything is different. Same kid…different future. Different path. And not just for your kiddo. But for your whole family. For me I felt like a label was tattooed on my son’s forehead. And ultimately mine. I thought the label…
Read MoreThe Dreaded Question: ‘Do You Medicate Your Son With Autism?’
I hate this question. I hate it so much that even typing the sentence ‘do you medicate your son‘ gives me anxiety. It’s not that I mind sharing the answer with you. I am an open book. I also firmly believe that as parents we can help our children even more by speaking opening and honestly about what’s working and what’s not. I remember years ago when Cooper was first diagnosed I just wanted someone to tell me what to do. Tell me the best course of action to help…
Read MoreMy Son, I’ve Failed You
My dearest son, Today, I failed you. I failed as your voice, your advocate, and your mother. Since you know me kid, if you could speak, you would probably say, ‘Oh, mama…You are too hard on yourself‘. And, maybe I am. I just love you so much and I cannot stand the thought of the world not giving you a chance. Or learning about your disability. I cannot stand the fact that they refuse to acknowledge the real you. You have autism kid. It’s okay to say that. It’s even…
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