Guest Post
Pieces in Our Puzzle
Our little family has three children. We have twins (a boy – Nolan and a girl- Harper) who are five and another little girl, Mia, who is almost three. It took us three years, three miscarriages and two rounds of IVF to finally have our twins. I thought that would be the hardest part of our parenting journey. I thought that we had made it to the other side and now we would just be a “normal” family. I was wrong. When Harper, our oldest daughter, was 15 months old…
Read MoreAutism is Messy – The Cost of Independence
In these two photos, the photo on the left is a photo of the chair cushion where our autistic kid sits for his meals. The picture doesn’t come remotely close to showing the extent of the abuse this chair has taken. To give you a comparison, the photo on the right is another chair at the same table where others in the family sit. Yes. The two chairs are from the same set. And yes. The damage is clearly permanent. Our boy is thankfully a pretty good eater (praise God…
Read MoreAnother Adventure in Motherhood
To my wonderful son, When you were born, I knew I was going on another adventure in motherhood. I didn’t know that you would make me a much different person than I was then. You learned how to talk at 15 months, gave the best hugs and kisses ever, and started getting into everything you could. By the time you were four, you had already broken your right foot and left arm, had stitches and a small concussion. Your pediatrician called it the “trifecta of childhood”. Along with the adventures…
Read MoreHard Days are Allowed
When I think about my experience with autism so far, there are a few moments of awakening that really stand out. One of those was Johnny’s second birthday. We had known about his autism for four months and, naively, I thought that the ups and downs we had experienced since that time meant we were “through” the acclimation phase. I thought that we were already prepared to settle in to our altered version of normal. That day, we drove over an hour to meet with most of our family and…
Read MoreA Story About a Boy
Max Richard is my son. On November 7th, 2012, he was officially diagnosed with Mild Cerebral Palsy. At the time, it was like the life had been taken from my body. Like a dream I couldn’t wake up from. Max began to make improvements with therapy but as of August 16th, 2013, he was not talking. Flash forward to today. He is still not talking. Things have changed in our life. I got new job. We moved. Max has a baby sister Samantha. Still no talking. I’m not going to…
Read MoreThe Second Guess
Most of autism has been a guessing game. I don’t know why my daughter has autism. I guess if could be: Genetics Environment Early birth Or the crop duster that used to fly over my house I haven’t the faintest idea why some days she is so happy and other days crazy with rage. I guess it could be: Hormones Inflammation Weather changes Who knows why she can sleep for four nights and then is up again for three? I guess it could be: Something she ate Something she dreamt…
Read MoreUnderstanding Different Approaches for Emotional Regulation
One thing I’ve learned in my work with children and families across the globe is that no two families or children are alike. Every time I think I have the secret sauce for helping a tantrum-prone child with autism in Germany, Japan, Texas, or Ontario, I’m humbled by the reality that what works well for one family may fail miserably for another. Over many years of clinical work at Boston Children’s Hospital and in private practice, I’ve come to the conclusion that a “one size fits all” approach simply doesn’t…
Read MoreThe First Day of Autism
The first day I realized my baby boy was autistic is one of those days that will forever be etched in my memory. Like the day my husband and I found out in the ultrasound room that our baby was a boy, or the night we walked together on our favorite trail while I was in labor with him. My husband sang to my stomach to let Johnny know he was loved, and that we were waiting for him on the other side of the dark. I remember it like…
Read MoreFriend, My World is Different
Dear what could have been friend, And I say could have, but it’s not you, it’s me. Typical, right? But hear me out. I am generally a good person. And I don’t mean that in a boasting/bragging kinda way, just a that’s kinda how you should be way. Treat people the way you want to be treated, and all that. And you see I want this, I really do. I wish that every time you asked me a question I wasn’t simultaneously watching my child like a hawk. And it’s…
Read MoreAdvocating for my Child Doesn’t Mean I am Trying to Cure Him
The small room is kept cold and quite. It only has one long rectangular table with 12 black cushioned chairs that have wheels at the bottom of them. The walls are painted light tan, with no pictures hanging from it, and the carpet is dark brown. You can not hear the sound of my heels walking to one of the chairs where I will sit for the next hour. It’s August and every room at the board of education is full and humming with excitement and nervousness for the upcoming…
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