Autism
A Letter to my Son on his 9th Birthday…
My sweet boy, today is your birthday. 9 years old. I know it sounds silly, but I almost can’t believe it. All moms say that I suppose. But with you, it’s true. Time in our world is different. Fast. Then slow. Then backwards. Even upside down. It has even stopped. Man those were some tough years. But you and I both know that age is just a number. And milestones are just another checklist we don’t pay any attention too. Because you my son, are different. Perfectly, amazingly different. You…
Read MoreMom, Dad, You have not Failed
I had the honor of meeting with a doctor today. A very important doctor. I was telling him all about my Cooper. What we’ve been through. I started at the beginning. He didn’t sleep. Not ever. Everyone told me it would get better. They said I was exaggerating. Only I knew I wasn’t. I told him it took Cooper six years to sleep through the night. And even today, it’s still a struggle. I told him about the burst ear drums. One after another. How no doctor would get close…
Read MoreWhat is a Brother?
What is a brother? Funny question right? Do brothers have to play together? Or talk? Or spend time together? Do they have to do those things? For the first three years of Sawyer’s life, he followed his older brother around. First by crawling. Then walking. Finally running. See, Cooper never stopped moving. Not ever. Sawyer thought it was a game. Cooper would run from room to room, tearing apart beds, putting garbage cans and shampoo bottles in the bathtub, emptying bookshelves and so on. From room to room he’d go.…
Read MoreHelp STOP Infantile Spasms
Nearly 1,200 infants every year are diagnosed with a rare seizure disorder called infantile spasms, yet many health care providers have never heard of this disease. There is a great need for awareness to help parents, caregivers, and providers to understand the signs and symptoms. Infantile spasms present as seizures that occur in infants under age 1 and can cause catastrophic, permanent damage to a child’s developing brain. Even more frightening, infantile spasms are often subtle enough to be easily overlooked by both parents and health care providers. Prompt diagnosis…
Read MoreIt Was Against the Health Policy
Today, we went to the library. It’s the same library I used to visit as a child. I’ve taken the boys several times in the hope of instilling a love of reading. Milo, my eight-year-old son with autism, was having a difficult time — nothing new — but I was taking care of things. I sat with him at a table in a corner of the children’s section while my six-year-old son, Linus, selected books nearby. Just seconds after I snapped this picture, a librarian approached us. I looked up…
Read MoreHe Must Be Outgrowing It and Other Things Not To Say
One of the challenging parts of high functioning autism is the way its seen and understood by the outside world. Most of the time the child’s diagnosis is not immediately apparent to the people they encounter. You may notice a speech delay, some difficulty with communication and social situations, lack of social comfort, sensory issues, short attention spans, narrow interests, and being prone to tantrums or meltdowns, just to name a few. Every child on the spectrum is different from the next and should not be compared just because you…
Read MoreThe Gift of Perspective
This ‘ten year challenge’ social media trend has me reflecting. There’s a lot of living and learning I went through over the past decade. I finished university, survived my first heartbreak, started my teaching career, gained and lost important relationships, bought and sold two homes, navigated the shock of a miscarriage, found my way back to that guy who broke my heart, had a daughter with and married him, battled through the Autism diagnosis of my toddler and started on an unexpected journey of special needs parenting. Today, I found…
Read MoreThe Things Special Needs Parents Should be Talking About
There is a part of this special needs parenting thing that I’ve been thinking a lot about lately. I never thought about it when he was younger. Honestly, it never occurred to me as a thing to think about. I was so focused too. Focused on helping him in the moment. So this never occurred to me. But now that he’s almost 9, and we can breathe, and he’s at peace, it’s starting to creep in. This thing. This new worry. It’s seeping in around the edges of my acceptance.…
Read MoreWe are Thankful for You
And then it happens….one day you wake up and your in this place. This beautifully loud, exhausting, perfect place. You look around and see that you’re a mom with three boys. Three boys who are exactly the people they are supposed to be. No different. No less. You’re in the place where everything feels right. A place full of trains, dancing, Pokémon cards, hockey, and little boy kisses. You made it. Your heart is calm. Your days are bright. Your thoughts are positive. Your vision is clear. And the love.…
Read MoreOur Life is No Different Than Yours
Our life is no different than yours. Not really. I have three boys. One is 8. He doesn’t say much. But he’s always listening. He hears everything. One is six. He never stops talking. He seems to never be listening. Not ever. And the baby, well, he never stops moving. He really loves kids. And fly swatters. And crackers. Our house is loud. And so cluttered. Our toilets all need to be scrubbed. Every counter seems to be sticky. We can’t keep up with the dishes. We start the dryer…
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