My son has been in school for a little over a month now. He is a 7th grader at our local middle school. Except it looks a little different than most. He doesn’t switch classes. Or have a locker combination. And we’ve never had to worry about the cell phone policy. I have no idea what the cool kids are wearing or even what middle schoolers are into. And I don’t know anything about the extracurricular activities and often I tear up when I read the newsletter. It’s hard to…
Last night something monumental happened in our little world. Our middle son Sawyer had a gaggle of friends over playing and as they ran from room to room, crashing and bashing and giggling about farts and butts, our oldest son Cooper ran behind. He was the oldest of the whole group on paper. The big brother and yet not. He will be 13 in a few months. But he has no interest in Nerf Guns or ninja warrior games. He doesn’t acknowledge the coolest shoes or ask for a cell…
When my son Cooper was first diagnosed with autism, and in the years that followed, I spent a lot of time secretly wondering what our relationship would be like. I was told he would never be able to talk. Or live independently. And a whole lot of other things as well. And I’d wonder. And worry. Would we ever have a conversation? Would we ever go grab dinner together at a restaurant? Go to his first concert? And so on. I’d wonder while driving and studying him in the rear…
For years, I’ve been on a mission to change perceptions about autism as an advocate and professional speaker. From my own experiences during my autism journey, I’ve realized that autistic individuals aren’t just capable of working in traditional jobs but can soar to leadership roles, turning the conventional thinking about our community upside down. During months like October for National Disability Employment Awareness Month, where our society has more conversations around disability employment, I hope we can focus on this topic. When people think about autism, they often associate it…
My daughter, Olivia, is 14 years old. She is autistic, she has Sensory Processing Disorder, and anxiety. These photos were taken in 2009, during my daughter’s first year of life. Look at her amazing joint attention. She is always looking directly at me with a smile as bright as the sun. Such happy, beautiful pictures of our baby girl. This was before the regression happened. Before she became locked inside herself. Before the joy of hearing her first words, only to have them all disappear as quickly as they appeared.…
When my son was two years old his daycare provider told me that he would never speak, make a friend, or ride a bike. She later went on to say he would never hit a baseball. She told me at my car after I had buckled my son into his car seat and closed the door. She had followed me out. She was determined to tell me her predictions. In the ten years that have since passed I have replayed that conversation a million times in my head. It broke…
“We should start planning for his future?” This is what my husband often says, but neither of us are sure where exactly to start. Should we set up a special needs account? Who will be in charge of his care? Where will he live? Who will explain to him what’s going on and how? I keep telling myself that we don’t need to think about this for a long time, but the reality is, we do. The fact of the matter is, something can happen to any of us tomorrow.…
I will never forget the day I found out I was pregnant with my second child. It was a surprise as they say. Our first born son Cooper had just turned one and terms like ‘speech delay’ and ‘development delay’ were already being discussed. When Sawyer was born 9 months later I was scared to say the least. A diagnosis of autism was being discussed. But it was more than that. I felt like a failure as a mom to my first born. How would I be able to give…
Pictures are funny. You can look at a seemingly ordinary one and think nothing of it. Like this photo. A mom. Two kids. An older boy. A younger girl. A baby doll. They appear to be at a place with model trains. What you don’t see is the hard work. The years of practice. The relentless journey of hope. The prayers. The picture doesn’t tell you that the older boy has a diagnosis of severe nonverbal autism. And for nearly all of his life going into the community was incredibly…
People ask me all the time how they can help. Kind people. Loving people. Strangers. Friends. Family. People on this page. I speak about that out of control feeling that happens when my son starts struggling. When his big feelings about waiting or sitting overwhelm him. Or when the noise is too much, and the lights are too bright, or he smells something in the air that you and I can’t make out. Maybe we are in line at the grocery store. Or at a hockey rink watching his younger…
