Posts by Kate Swenson
My Plea, Just See Him
The thing with growing tiny humans is they are always changing. Learning. Absorbing. Getting bigger. My son Cooper is 12 years old. He wants to ride an Amtrak train more than anything. He has a countdown to see his Grandma. He loves going to school. He also is autistic and technically non speaking on paper. But if you know him you know he has loads of words and sounds and signs and he can spell and read and even use movie scenes to tell us things. It’s unbelievable really. They…
Read MoreCelebrating the ‘Late’ Successes
A few days ago, someone said to a friend of mine, who has an autistic son so similar to Cooper that you’d think they were brothers, that her posts about her son were negative. She was upset of course. She didn’t feel like she was being negative. She thought she was just sharing their life. And him. And in fact, she celebrates her son much like I do Coops. I told her my hunch. That people looking in ‘think’ we are being negative when we share because our kids do…
Read MoreUnderstanding My Son’s Autism
I am not autistic, my son is. And I spend much of time trying to understand him so I can be a better advocate. How he thinks. How he processes. Why he likes certain things. Or doesn’t like others. And how I can help him understand this world that wasn’t really made for him. His brain often feels a bit confusing to me. Mysterious even. Intriguing at the same time. Autism. Blurring the edges a bit. Touching all of his parts. Yesterday, as we were driving together, Cooper saw a…
Read More“He’s My Brother Mom. My Big Brother”
I have been living the autism parenting life for 12 years now. We are in the middle. We made it through the wondering and worrying. Past the sting of the beginning. I like to say we all settled into this secret world. Me. My husband. Cooper. And his siblings. We don’t know anything different. And we couldn’t imagine Cooper being anything other than himself. We don’t whisper autism. We share it. Loudly. Proudly. And with conviction. He is Cooper. Something happened though. Something I knew would come one day. I…
Read MoreI Belong to a Boy With Anxiety
Today, I watched you slip away. It happened bit by bit, piece by piece. Slow at first. Then all at once. The elephant in the room got you. The one that steals you from me now and again. The one I refuse to lose you too completely. Anxiety. You have it. Not me. I am just the mother. I am anxiety adjacent. I belong to a boy with anxiety. I see it coming. I feel it and hear it. Other people have no idea. But I do. At 4 am…
Read MoreThe Ones Who Don’t Bat An Eye
I saw them before they saw me. Cautiously walking into the movie theater. A mom. A son. The boy was big. Taller than me. He had headphones on. His hands danced like my son. He moved fast and slow getting the lay of the land. I greeted her immediately. I knew she was with us. She was kind. She was looking for her people. ‘After our kids get older, it’s so hard to meet people. Once they are in their twenties…’ her sentence trailing off as she followed behind her…
Read MoreHe Joined Us
You see a child lying on the floor watching an iPad in front of the tv. I see progress. I see hopes and wishes happening. I see a child who joined our family for a movie tonight. See, it doesn’t happen all that often. Typically, he stays up on his room watching the history of the great American railway or John Deere tractors. But tonight he came down. He joined us. He brought 3 blankets. And his stories on his iPad. He started on the couch. But prefers the floor.…
Read MoreWeightless
When I share about parenting my autistic son, I often use the word ‘intense.’ Like you are in a crowded room and someone turns the temperature dial up bit by bit. Slowly at first. Then faster. Tick tick boom. Or I’ve even said it’s a game of negotiation. Me talking him off or on the ledge. There are no little things with his autism. Only big. It’s like his mind won’t let his body be calm. Like they are at odds. And it comes out of him. His body can’t…
Read MoreWhy Don’t You Bring Your Other Kids To The Zoo? (Video Post)
Sharing your life on social media can be so rewarding at times. Helping other families, educating about autism, bringing awareness, has changed my life. Honestly, this is my purpose. I don’t’ want any other parent to feel alone on this journey…like I did in the beginning. But, with the good comes other parts too. And often, I truly feel like I am being scolded a thousand times over by people. I try to remember though; people are only seeing a 5-minute glimpse into our lives. That’s not much. A few…
Read MoreThe Third Baby
This is baby Harbor. The third baby. The third boy. The third little thief of sleep and sanity. He turned 4 years old in October. The word I would use to describe him is…curious. He is kicking soccer balls, negotiating in full sentences, eating with a fork, and playing hockey. Although, he likes to sing songs and do experiments more. Of all three of my boys, he is the busiest. He wants to know how things work. Like the toilet. And Kleenex boxes. And mud puddles. He has the biggest…
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