Please See The Whole Picture

I share a lot of our struggle. I need it to be seen. It cannot be the part of autism that gets ignored to make others more comfortable. And I feel like so much of severe autism gets minimized. It has to have a voice! I don’t just want people to be aware or accept, I want you to be a voice, an advocate and see the whole picture. You have to see the dark, because it is there whether you want to see it or not. However, with that…

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No Child Left Behind

It is November and the first progress reports have been sent home and parent-teacher conferences have happened. My son Caleb is adjusting well to 5 days a week of Pre-K. His speech has improved, we are using sentences with 3-4 words and answering some ‘yes and no’ questions without prompts. I am definitely seeing the growth from last year. His teachers and I both agree that we have to continue working on independence. He sticks to them like glue and gets jealous of the younger kids. At home, he sticks…

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Start the Tough Conversations

What is the most difficult, yet important conversation you’ve had around your child’s needs? Maybe it was around medications. Or the decision to have more children. For Jamie and I, it was around forever. It took us years to be able to sit down and rationally speak about it. In the beginning, I’d bring it up. We’d fight. Months later, he’d bring it up after a few drinks, and I’d cry. We could never get on the same page at the same time. I think it had to do with…

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I Wish I Had a Crystal Ball

When my son was diagnosed with autism over five years ago, I thought it was a race against time. I thought if we did everything all at once, all the therapies and services, we would help him, and he would eventually get back on track. I knew he’d always have autism. I was never one that thought it would go away. But I did think we would help him, bit by bit, and eventually he’d be where he needed to be. Which at the time I thought was alongside his…

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Why I am Thankful for my Special Needs Daughter

I am thankful for my special needs daughter.  I should probably clarify.  I’m thankful for my daughter…not the special needs. I’m not a parent who says that I wouldn’t make life easier for her if I could. I would. But that’s a topic for another post. Today is about a golden birthday and it’s about being thankful. It’s a lesson that I’ve learned over the years about perspective. Today, November 12th, is my daughter Liz’s 12th birthday! Liz has a rare genetic mutation and along with that has come a…

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Dare to Believe Mom and Dad

When my son was five years old, we had no good days. We had bad days and okay days. I am scared to admit that because I know someone reading this will judge me. They will say I am a bad mom. Or say I am weak for admitting that. But, if our story helps one person, gives one mom or dad hope, than it’s worth it. When my son was five, he was unable to communicate. He couldn’t tell us if he was in pain, or if his socks…

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A Magical World

I often say we live in a magical world. My son and I. A world where we communicate with our hearts instead of our mouths. A world full of color and trains. Sometimes it’s upside down, backwards, even inside out in our world. Some days we move forward. Some days we stand still. We celebrate the craziest, oddest things. Things that everyone else takes for granted. Some days I swear we are the lucky ones. Some days I pray for it to get easier. I pray for simple. I pray…

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Parents, I have a Plea from the Bottom of my Heart

To explain, this week there were two incidents that tore me up inside.  I met a beautiful little 4 year old who I found out is in my daughter Evangeline’s class at school. When I asked if she knew Evie, she said with wide eyes ‘Yes! Evie just cries all the time!’ She was a sweet thing and meant no harm, but it hurt hearing that as her description of my daughter. Then, I was told by her caregiver that when they were leaving school this week, another classmate pointed…

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Things I Didn’t Know About Motherhood Until I Became One

I didn’t realize how mad I could get at my spouse over something so silly. I didn’t realize how close to the mental brink a child could push me. And the things I would argue over… I didn’t realize how precious 5 minutes of alone time in the bathroom could be. I didn’t realize how much pee, poop and puke I would clean up. I didn’t know that I would resent the time it takes to shower, eat, pee and poop because they take up too much time. I didn’t…

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Enter Your Child’s World

One of the things I hear the most often from parents of newly diagnosed children is…I can’t figure out how to get my child to play with me. Or, I can’t find an activity for us to do together. This is coming from moms and dads who are trying so hard. They are desperate to get inside. But they don’t know how. Not yet anyways. Boy does that resonate with me. I was that mom years ago. My son wouldn’t play with me. In fact, he didn’t play at all.…

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