Advocating for your Child’s Health

A wonderful medical professional once told me something that changed my way of thinking forever.

She wasn’t some big huge doctor. I didn’t wait months for my son to get an appointment with her. And yet, she changed his life.

My nonverbal son was sick. Really sick. But because he didn’t show the typical signs, I didn’t know.

No fever. No ‘my head hurts.’ No pointing. No saying ‘ow.’

Instead I was seeing a lot of self injuring. He wasn’t sleeping.

So much screaming. More gaining control through behaviors. And at the same time more isolation from his family.

More aggressive behaviors. His school was calling with concerns.

I could not for the life of me figure out what had changed. Or what was wrong. Many said to me…’oh, that’s just autism. The typical ups and downs.’

That didn’t feel right to me. I vowed to figure out what and why.

We found out later how sick he was. Because a nurse finally listened. She got on the floor with him. She took the time.

As I was beating myself up for not knowing, I mean, how does a parent not know, she said…

‘People, especially children, who are unable to communicate verbally, and who can be challenging patients, give up trying to communicate pain. And they do that because no one listens to the ways they are able to communicate.’

I felt like I’d been punched in the stomach. What a heartbreaking reality for people like my son. Living in pain because no one listens. No one should live like that.

I’ve done better since then. And I’ve demanded that the people in his life do better too.

That’s what growth is as a parent. Doing better when you know. Demanding answers. And never giving up.

My son is sick today. Really sick. The whole family is actually. And every person is carrying on and whining. Because that’s what people with the flu do.

But not Cooper. He hasn’t complained once.

Thankfully, I saw the signs last night. And I knew to look because that nurse told me to look deeper. And listen without my ears.

Never give up advocating for your kid’s health, wellbeing and future. You might be the only one who is and the only one who will listen.

Interested in writing for Finding Cooper’s Voice? LEARN MORE

Finding Cooper’s Voice is a safe, humorous, caring and honest place where you can celebrate the unique challenges of parenting a special needs child. Because you’re never alone in the struggles you face. And once you find your people, your allies, your village….all the challenges and struggles will seem just a little bit easier. Welcome to our journey. You can also follow us on Facebook, subscribe for exclusive videos, and subscribe to our newsletter.