Posts Tagged ‘Special Needs Parenting’
You Need to Discipline that Child
I shared a photo the other day of my sweet son with his photos. His treasures. In the picture Cooper was using a photo of his brothers to stim on his Kindle. Pretty cut and dry. The caption read “Cooper and his babies.” Gathered around him were more of his treasures. Mail. More photos. A bookmark. Books. A train magazine. You can’t tell from the photo but Cooper was in his glory. I was making dinner. The baby was in his high chair. Sawyer was playing hockey in the front…
Read MoreTake my Hand
“Take my hand, we’re gonna go, where, we, can, shine!” Music has always been a way for me to heal. I don’t play, I don’t sing…I listen. There have been times in my life I feel as though I am being punished. Being punished…but for what? I am not quite sure? A dark cloud forms and rains down…. but why? I have racked my brain. I have asked tough questions. I have dug deep, deeper then I know others are even capable of going. I have blamed others. I have…
Read MoreYou Boys have made my Heart Whole
Caleb and Ben, my sweet little boys, you both mean the world to me. You’ll never even know. You wake up each day with big smiley grins. Those smiles melt my heart, and I live for them. You both have fragile x syndrome; there’s no denying it runs our household. And although it’s been quite far our biggest challenge, it’s shown me the most amazing abilities you both hold within. When some say they’ve worked hard for everything in their life, they have no idea. You two have and will…
Read MoreI didn’t see it then, but I do now…
I’ve been feeling a lot lately like I need to get my words out, get my feelings out. It tends to happen when my husband is away at work, which is something that doesn’t happen often these days. We have gotten very used to him being here similar to how “normal” families operate. But when he is not here, I find that my weeks are filled with kids, work, and minimal adult conversations. And let’s face it, sometimes he does not want to listen to me babble! There is something…
Read MoreI am the Lucky One
I get to see and hear the world through his eyes. We dance to our reflections in windows. We twirl to music. We lay on the ground just to feel the carpet on our cheeks. We laugh at a sneeze or a hiccup. Over and over again. We make funny noises. We run. We roll. We don’t care what anyone thinks. We laugh. Only his laugh is way better than mine. It’s the best noise I have ever heard. Deep from the belly. We eat cupcakes. But only the frosting.…
Read MoreListen with your Heart
Hearts have always been my son’s favorite shape. Because of his autism and limited verbal skills, in all of his five years on earth he hasn’t told me this, I just know. He is drawn to them. He likes to build them by putting other shapes together and points them out whenever he comes across one. This makes perfect sense, with him being the sweetest little guy I know. Sweet, and a little spicy, too. He is often in his own world, one that we are constantly working to understand,…
Read MoreA Family of Five
‘I think it’s terrible that you go places without Cooper all the time. I think you are awful, awful parents. And you are teaching your other children that Cooper doesn’t matter. Shame on you.’ -An excerpt of a recent email from a super fan. Very little amazes me on this blogging journey anymore. Even an email like this one. But what does amaze me is how people still don’t understand the agonizing decisions that special needs parents have to make every day. And that even though we make the tough…
Read MoreThe Price of Strength
Raising two girls with autism has made me stronger than I ever imagined I could be. I have found strength at my low points that looking back feels like someone else. The rare times when I allow myself to think about why my husband and I “chosen” for this life, I’m not sure it was because we were particularly strong before autism. We were young, invincible, and soul mates from the start. We were together for 4 years before our fairy tale wedding and knew we wanted to start a…
Read MoreAs Long As He’s Healthy
While at a recent doctor appointment I was chatting with a young, pregnant woman. I congratulated her and asked her if she knew the sex of the baby. She said she didn’t know and didn’t have a preference, “as long as the baby is healthy.” I smiled and nodded but inside I thought about how this phrase has a new meaning to me since my daughter’s autism diagnosis seven years ago. When someone uses that phrase, I feel sadness in my heart. I think to myself, will she accept and…
Read MoreCan Children with Severe Autism be Happy?
When a child is diagnosed with autism, it can feel like the whole world is collapsing. I should know — I felt that way in 1999 when my son, Lucas, was diagnosed with moderate-to-severe autism just before his third birthday. My younger son, Spencer, was 18 months old and all the dreams I had of them growing up and being best friends disappeared. It makes me sad to think of how devastated and disappointed I felt in those early days, and I wish I could go back and give myself…
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