Posts Tagged ‘nonverbal autism’
How do I Explain Autism…
I’ve been thinking about this for a long time. How would I explain my autism world to someone with no experience with autism? I have two sons, ages 3 and 5. They both have moderate autism with severe communication delays. From a distance, or through filtered Instagram pictures, my sons look perfectly normal. Their disability appears discrete and insignificant to the untrained eye. How debilitating could it be? It’s absolutely devastating and almost invisible at the same time. My sons are verbal and I thank God for that. A verbal…
Read MoreI’m not Always Grateful
I sat there bouncing my baby on my knee. I was surrounded by people. I watched the group of children singing Jesus Loves Me. So casually. Standing in a line. The youngest was 4. The oldest was 8. A boy. Cooper’s age. I watched him specifically. He was wearing a tie. He was standing so still. Holding the microphone. Then he sang his name. Four words. ‘My name is Ben.’ He sounded like an angel. I realized in that moment I wasn’t breathing. I had stopped bouncing my baby. I…
Read MoreThe Little Boy in the Mirror
Young boy looks in the mirror and wonders, who am I to you? I know I’m some kind of different and not less Yet I’m more than just a condition Just have to accept me with love and understanding Because I’m that amazing, unique, and special all wrapped in one I see that little boy in the mirror now and I say You’re perfect just who you are Love doesn’t need no words You are worth everything and more Still I accept just who you are Because just like the…
Read MoreThe Secrets We Keep
I backed out of the garage. Music blaring. Sunglasses on. To my neighbors it probably appeared like I was just running an errand. To the grocery store most likely. My neighborhood was alive as usual. So many people in their yards and driveways. I saw kids playing tag. Some were riding bikes. A few waved and shouted, ‘hello.’ I saw people gathered at the park. Babies in strollers. Dogs chasing balls. I live here, in this neighborhood. Suburbia. Every family much like ours. Two or more kids. Parents busy with…
Read MoreHow Does this End?
When my son was diagnosed with autism over five years ago, I thought it was a race against time. I thought if we did everything all at once, all the therapies and services, we would help him, and he would eventually get back on track. I knew he’d always have autism. I was never one that thought it would go away. But I did think we would help him, bit by bit, and eventually he’d be where he needed to be. Which at the time I thought was alongside his…
Read MoreThe 4 Things that Helped our Son the Most
Many of you have been following our story for years. Some even since Cooper was three when I started this blog. You’ve seen the ups and downs. The highs and the lows. You watched me struggle. And Cooper too. Severe autism is a roller coaster. There is no doubt about that. Today, he is 8 and doing so great. He is potty trained, sleeping, walking in the community, acknowledging people and his brothers, and starting to communicate. Yes, his diagnosis is still severe, nonverbal autism with a side of Apraxia…
Read MoreThe Box of Kleenex on the Table
On the 24th of August, my husband and I sat hand in hand to finish a year long diagnostic journey to understand why our son Romeo lives in such silence. I could feel Gerardo’s fingers stroke my knuckles as the words spilled from the specialists mouth. As they sat and explained therapies, research, support groups…my mind wandered to the Kleenex box on the table. My child wasn’t sick, his life wasn’t in danger and the world didn’t stop turning. Romeo didn’t stop being Romeo. We just had a name for…
Read MoreIt’s the Isolation that Got Us
My son is starting to communicate. It’s almost unbelievable to me. If you would have told me a year ago that my son would even attempt to say words I wouldn’t have believed you. If you would have told me two years ago that he would be potty trained I also would have probably laughed at you. Not because he isn’t smart and amazing. But because it just seemed so impossible at the time. But I was wrong. He is blowing us away lately. He has started dressing himself. He…
Read MorePlease Allow Me to Feel the Hard Parts
Mother’s day has always been hard for me. Growing up with a single dad and a mother who was not a part of my life, (and when she was, caused a lot of heartache, confusion, and chaos) I always hated Mother’s Day. I have had some amazing women in my life step up and try to help take the place of an absent mother, but I’ll be honest and say that nothing ever fills that void. I thought becoming a mother would help though. I wanted nothing more than to…
Read MoreI was the Gloom and Doom Mom
Yesterday, I celebrated my eighth Mother’s Day. I’m not sure how that is possible but I did the math and it is indeed right. I have three boys. Each delightfully amazing in their own way. Cooper is 8. He is the happiest boy you will ever meet. He has taught me more about life than anyone or anything else. He is my shadow. I am his person and he is mine. I have Sawyer who is 6. He is incredible and pushes me to my limits daily. He is smart,…
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