Posts Tagged ‘nonverbal autism’
We’re On An Adventure
I can’t tell you the last spontaneous thing we have done as a family. I reckon it’s been eight years. Trips and outings are planned meticulously to help our kiddo be successful. But, well, when you realize you forgot his favorite paper to stim on, and you need to get out of the house so you don’t all lose your minds…you take a trip to town. (That’s what you say when you live in the country…you go to town!) You risk it. We are doing it. We couldn’t have even dared…
Read MoreAge is Just a Number
Yesterday I was scrolling mindlessly through Instagram, as I usually do, when I saw a picture that stopped my finger mid-motion. It was a little girl I knew well. Her mom, a friend of mine. We were pregnant at the same time. We have slipped apart over the years, as we so often do. The photo was precious. The caption read, the last day of third grade. Third grade. Wow. For a second I thought, that can’t be right. I did the math. It was right. If my son was…
Read MoreYears Of Practice Will Bring Success
We practice. I remember in the beginning feeling overwhelmed about all of the things my son needed to learn. Things that came seemingly easy for most children. Walking safely, using silverware, speaking, playing, self-care, I could go on and on. When I thought about all of it I almost couldn’t breathe at times. I didn’t know how to do it all. So, I did what any logical person would do…I made a list. I ranked them. I picked what was most important and what could wait. For our family, it…
Read MoreThe Beauty Of A Complicated Path
Lately I’ve been thinking a lot about the paths that each of my boys will take as they grow up. Three sons. 9, 7 and 1. Cooper, my oldest, well, it’s been complicated. So many daycares until we finally couldn’t find one to take him anymore. Then starting in the school district at age three, multiple day programs, IEP meetings, transportation to and from, trusting the world with my tiny, yet mighty, nonverbal, unaware child who could hardly hold up his backpack. I waved goodbye to a child who didn’t know…
Read MoreTeaching Kids Kindness
Before I had babies, and even when they were younger, I had preconceived notions of what I would teach them throughout their lives. I assumed how to walk. And talk. Throw a ball. Read and write. I assumed we’d practice riding a bike and hitting a baseball. Later on I’d teach them to drive a car and how to dress for an interview and tip at a restaurant. Tangible things. It’s funny now because yes, those things matter. A’s on tests matter. Making the team matters. But kindness matters too.…
Read MoreA Letter to My Little Brother
Hey brother, I’m hoping that someday I can say this all to you. But there is a chance that I might never be able to…I’m hoping that when you are older you will read this and understand. I know I confuse you. I’m so loud. I flap my arms. I don’t notice toys. Or play sports. Or like to leave our house. I don’t have any friends. Or really pay any attention to you either. I just like mom and dad. I don’t play like you. I have never ridden…
Read MoreWhat We Won’t Do For Our Kids
When I have kids they will never… Remember those thoughts? From before you had children of your own? I had them for sure. My two favorites were…I will never have dirty car seats because my babies will never eat in my car. And my kids will never have snotty noses. Of course I didn’t have one kid, let alone three at that time. I laugh at that now as I hand food back to a screaming child and clean goldfish pieces from my floor mats. And as I use my…
Read MoreWhen Vacationing Is “Brave”
‘You’re so brave for going on vacation without your kids. I could never do that as a mother.’ Hold up. Stop the train. What a thing to read at 3 am. That is what we call a backhanded compliment. I get them all the time. But this one, well, it struck a nerve. See, I did go on vacation. I abandoned my three sweet boys and husband to go to Disney for four blissful days. I pushed pause on my own work, canceled therapy appointments and organized what I could…
Read MoreLost in the ‘Possible’
A mum sent me a message earlier, about grief. Grief and autism. It may sound morbid, and it may not be the same for everyone, but this is absolutely a thing to me. When my son was diagnosed, I did cry A LOT, I cried any chance I could really, any time I was alone or any time the kids were all asleep at night, I cried. I guess I still do, only now it’s not the same kind of cry… To be told something so impacting, so unknown and…
Read MoreEvery Part of You
I stand in the darkAt the side of your bedBeckoning your anxiety away Reassuring you I’m here-You’re safeYou’re lovedYou’re not alone Midnight hours tick away The morning will soon greet us I askAre you feeling sickHurtAre you afraid My questions are met with your silenceLeft suspended in the air You fall asleepBut not for longSleep never visits long I’m at the front line Fighting your silent warA war-Locked somewhere deep inside of you Sometimes its not so silent Its loud screamsHiding in small, dark spacesHysteriaHead bangingDangerous Self harmingEloping Isolation Sometimes there is no warIt’s Thomas the…
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