Posts Tagged ‘autism’
Thank you for being You
I want to thank you kid. It’s as simple and as complicated as that. I want to thank you for being you. This morning I dropped you off for your first day at an all-day play program. You had never been there before. You didn’t know what to expect. I promised games and kids and fun. But I could tell you were a little nervous. On the drive over you were so excited to have a lunch packed. That was a huge deal to you. As usual you were peppering…
Read MoreHow do you Feel about your Son’s Autism Diagnosis?
Our son was diagnosed with autism in October 2018. It’s taken me some time to feel comfortable talking about his diagnosis. I just wasn’t ready to talk about how I was feeling. But now I think I am finally ready to answer the inevitable question that follows my disclosure: So, how do you feel about your son’s autism diagnosis? It’s not a short answer because I have lots of different feelings about the diagnosis… Relief My initial emotion when I got the diagnosis was relief. Relief that the past two…
Read MoreNo One Tells You
Your first child turning 18 is an exciting time in a person’s life, right? A time when the child you grew within you reached the age of legal adulthood. It seems like those 18 years went by in a blink of an eye. A child you raised, guided, and encouraged throughout their childhood actually turned out pretty darn awesome. Your role in their life is different now. The little birdie is getting ready to leave the nest. They are preparing to go out on their own and conquer the world.…
Read MoreWill I be Sad Forever?
Dear Kate, I’m writing you because I don’t know who else to say this too. It’s late. 2 am actually. Everyone is sleeping. Although I know my son will be up in a hour. I should be sleeping. But I can’t. My son was diagnosed today with autism. It shouldn’t have been a surprise. I mean, I knew. We all knew. He has no words. He doesn’t even try to communicate. I overhead one of the aides in his preschool say she has never met a boy quite so autistic.…
Read MoreA Tale of Three Brothers
This morning my six year old was talking to his baby brother. I was running around getting lunches ready. We were running a bit late. And after a night of no sleep the morning felt never ending. I peeked over and saw Sawyer head first in Harbor’s car seat. He was talking to him in his loving, brotherly voice. ‘It’s your brother Harbor. Your big brother. I just love you baby.’ My heart absolutely melted. I watched Harbor stop fussing and grin at Sawyer. Those two. Already two peas in…
Read More11 Things I Learned about Autism at Target
My son has been having some pretty big breakthroughs lately. He’s been trying new foods. An apple, a grilled cheese, a hamburger and even his first French fry. He’s been more vocal. Calmer. Happier. His anxiety seems to be going down. All huge wins in our autism world. So, yesterday I asked him if he wanted to go to Target, like I have before. For the last 6 or so years when I ask him if he wants to leave the house the answer is always no. Well, he immediately…
Read MoreAdjustment in Progress: Big Brother, Baby Brother
The nights are the toughest when I’m alone with my boys while my husband is at work. Just now, putting my autistic son to sleep, my almost three-month-old baby boy cries. Gabe, who is six, is instantly anxious. He starts covering his ears, starts humming and whistling loudly. I wait a bit to see if the baby will stop, but he doesn’t. I explain to Gabe that mommy will have to check on the baby. He follows me to the room where the baby is, all the while whistling and…
Read MoreThe Day I Became your Mama
My oldest child, my twin, and the one I’ve sometimes wanted to bust in the chin. Sarcasm, or na? See what I did there. A rhyme for you. I bet you don’t have the slightest clue, but it’s true, God gave me you! You were the one who made me a Mama, more than 25 years ago. I was a mere 20 something years old, when you came. You were a gift from God, ain’t he good! You my daughter, bring joy to my day, come what may. Many times…
Read MoreI’m Letting the Guilt Hold me Back
The days are long but full of so much joy. We spend every waking moment devoted to our kids and a lot of sleepless night when our brains won’t let us sleep. We IEP, we advocate and we constantly search for services. We clean up the same hoard piles 19 times a day, we do therapy and we handle meltdowns like a champ. We get so busy just living with Autism that we forget to live. We forget to take care of ourselves. The guilt that comes with taking time…
Read MoreWhat Autism Gave Us
Autism is the most perplexing thing ever. The saying “when you meet one person with autism, you’ve met one person with autism” couldn’t be any more true. The way it manifests in every child differently. The way it can break your heart by watching your child struggle with what would be the simplest of tasks to a typical child. They way it isolates you from the rest of world. It can make you feel so alone. The regressions it causes. It can make you feel hopeless. Autism can be a…
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