Thank You for Learning About Autism

I want to say the hugest, most heartfelt thank you to each and everyone of you who has supported me and my family on this journey. I know that so many of you have fallen in love with Cooper and our story. Sawyer, Harbor and Wynnie too. And of course Jamie. 8 years ago I sat on my couch in Duluth, MN and I created a blog. I named it Finding Cooper’s Voice. And I truly had no intention of anyone every reading it. I poured my heart out to…

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Something “Wrong”

I often get asked when did I realize you were Autistic, and you are almost always with me when it happens. This is how the question is normally worded – “When did you notice something wrong?” I am usually more polite than this, because asking questions leads to understanding. I want to encourage others’ understanding, but I need you to know the uncensored answer to this recurring question. To be honest, I didn’t notice anything “wrong”. I was too busy snuggling you and thinking your happy flapping was adorable. I…

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Preorder Forever Boy Today

Four more days until the cover of my book, Forever Boy, is revealed! It is available on Amazon now though for preorder! This photo is one of the runner ups for the cover. It’s one of my favorite pictures of my boy and me. Someone asked me what the book is about and how it will differ from my blog. When you have a child diagnosed with something, anything, your world changes in an instant. It gets smaller for one. Suddenly, you feel like you are the only person on…

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Let Them Show Us the Way

When you have a child diagnosed with autism, at some point you will be told all the things they may never do or achieve. Whether it’s from a friend of a friend, a medical professional, an educator, the internet, or an evaluation where you spend hours filling in little bubbles next to questions that cut you like a knife. The limits will be placed. I wish it didn’t happen. I wish instead we were told about how yes, it will be different, and yes there may be parts of development…

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Kindness and Grace

Let me set the scene for you… My husband and two of our boys plus baby get on the elevator. We are loud and busy. Our two year old is trying to push all the buttons. I am using my hip to block him. Our ten year old is autistic and adores elevators. So he is happy flapping and dancing. Just as the door is about to close to bring us to the second floor of the hotel my husband yells out…‘I’ll hold the door for you!’ And a big,…

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Worth the Wait

There are really precious moments in life. Like when your father-in-law comes to find you to say… ‘Cooper and I just walked around the campground. He held my hand the whole entire way. He’s never done that before.’ He just beamed as he said it. Ten years is a long time to wait as a Grandpa. But worth every minute. I’ve never met a more loved or treasured little boy. Finding Cooper’s Voice is a safe, humorous, caring and honest place where you can celebrate the unique challenges of parenting…

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Visiting Thomas the Train

Our family has been visiting Thomas the Train at the Duluth Depot for 7 years. The picture on the lower right is from 2013. We were 2 months out from an autism diagnosis. With or without the appointment we knew. I’d read enough blog posts and taken the M-chat a hundred times and watched enough episodes of Parenthood to know. I knew it was autism. On that visit to Thomas, and many after, our son struggled. Too many people. Too loud. Too much waiting. Not enough patience from strangers. But…

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Expect the Unexpected

As autism parents, I think it’s a steadfast rule to celebrate the little things. We are always working towards a better tomorrow, better outcomes, better behavior. Taking it one step and one day at a time. Only planning as far into the future as we can manage and controlling what we can. Praying that all our hard work, encouragement and love gives our kids what they need to succeed. Well, our lives are fairly, predictable. I have gotten used to expecting that he wants 2 peanut butter sandwiches for lunch…

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Pictures in My Mind

When you become a parent, and probably even before, you imagine your child’s life. You imagine your own. You have this picture in your head of what it will look like. Scenarios. Highs. Successes. Wins. The beautiful moments. That’s normal. As humans we do that. We daydream. We imagine. When something challenges those images it can be hard. Like really hard. What you thought would be is not. I’m here to tell you that once you step off the path of what you pictured and into the unknown, your life…

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Five Things to Offer a Special Needs Mom Who’s Struggling

You see the posts, you hear the stories, but you don’t always know how to help….. You don’t have a child with special needs, but your friend or a family member does. You want to do something, but are unsure of where to start. Here are five ideas that have been life-changing for me. 1. Remind her that she’s doing a great job. When she’s in the toughest times she’s doubting her self, she’s wondering if it’s her fault, if she will ever make it through. Reach out, remind her…

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