The season I’ve been preparing for the past several years is here. This is the season my autistic daughter’s peers settle into their new college life or embark on some other momentous move towards independence. As I reflect on my first 16 months as a brand new mom, I remember forming close friendships with other new moms that I met in “Mommy and Me” groups, Little Gym classes, and various music classes for our pre-toddlers. We would seamlessly get together for weekly play groups at rotating houses. We’d take our…
We got outside this evening and it was amazing! Of all the settings that my boys have been in together, outside is always the best for them. No technology to distract. Just sticks. Big sticks. And rocks. And mud. Really cool leaves. And scratchy bark. Toads. Squirrels. And BUGS!! And we just walk. At our own pace. No pressure. Cooper loves throwing things into the woods. He loves the sounds that come. Crashes and bashes. And his brothers love helping him find the biggest sticks to throw. There is just…
I’ve been thinking a lot about hope lately. And the right amount to have. Which is a funny thing to think about really. Because, how can one have the wrong amount of hope? My son has autism. He is autistic. And that means his life will follow a different path than most. It means he has lots of unknowns. And parts that are hard for him. He has been robbed of a lot of the big things too. The ones that most parents take for granted for their children. And…
Am I brave enough? I just left the grocery store. I only had a few things today so opted for the self checkout today. While I scanned my items, I became aware of two young men next to me. I would say they were both in their 20’s. It dawned on me rather quickly that one was helping the other shop for groceries. He was helping him scan each item, slow and meticulously. Talking him through he step. The gentleman being helped was very much enjoying himself. He was laughing…
To the mama who is scared. The one who is carrying something heavy. In her heart. Her mind. And on her shoulders. To the mama who is worried. The one who cannot sleep. To the mama who is crushed. The weight of the exhaustion too much. I understand. You feel alone. You are not. You are here with so many of us. A member of our club. To the mama who doubts herself. Who researches. Who navigates. Who refuses to give up. Refuses to take no for an answer. I…
Do you have a ‘too much’ kid? One who has you white knuckling through parenting? I do. Our third born son. The one who never stops talking and asking questions. Who opens every drawer and cabinet. Who jumps off couches and as the parent you watch their life flash before your eyes. The one who demands bandaids for every imaginary owie. And has me pulling my hair out. This kid…when we hear his feet toddling down the still big steps in the morning we say…’and so it begins. He’s awake.’…
When it comes to Halloween and autism….whew, there is a lot of advice out there. And have you noticed a lot of it is really intense? Like almost intimidating? A lot of it makes me feel like I’m doing something wrong as a parent. Blue buckets. Signs. Saying trick-or-treat. Everyone should get candy. Do this. Not that. What I find the most interesting about all the preachy advice is that the ones giving it aren’t walking with our family on Halloween. They don’t know what works for us and what…
See these two boys? They are brothers. One is 10 and one is 8. They both have birthdays coming up and at least once a day I hear… ‘First Halloween, then Thanksgiving, then Cooper’s birthday and then mine!’ This family loves their birthdays. This photo may look like no big deal and when I snapped it, as the little brother walked his older brother into his first day of school this year, I remember pausing and thinking…this is it. This is what I prayed for. Every day. While driving. In…
Independence….. Today was the start of more “independence” for our son Alex! We live in a more rural area so we don’t have public transportation or taxis. They are unreliable. We have “Rides”…you call and schedule well ahead of time and they come take you where you need to go. So, today we started this service for Alex for his Day-Hab days. He always loved riding the bus so he was actually looking forward to this. He trotted out there like he’d done it a thousand times. Only potential issue…
Let me tell you about this boy. He is one of a kind for starters. Which is one of my most favorite things about him. He dances to music no one else can hear with courage and joy. He is more himself than any person I have ever met. Unapologetically. But he also comes with some pretty strict rules. Ones he has created himself. He does not stay up late. Nope. By 9 pm he is in bed every night. He watches the same movies on repeat. And has since…
