Posts by Kate Swenson
Dad adopts girl with Down syndrome who was rejected by 20 families
Long before I became a mother I attended a lunch-and-learn about adoption. At the time I worked for an amazing social services organization as a Project Manager. They also offered adoption services. I loved kids. I wanted to learn more. I also wanted lunch. As I sat there I learned about the insane costs and time that goes into adopting a child. Story after story of parents fighting for babies. The exhausting and emotional process was laid out for us. I learned that everyone wanted a baby. I learned that…
Read MoreMore Than Just a Dog
Last night our family said goodbye to our chocolate lab, Bauer. It was sudden. It was unexpected. And it was traumatic. He woke up fine. Around mid-day he started having trouble walking. By 4 we were at the vet. At 4:30 the vet told me that he had a splenic rupture caused by a tumor and his tummy was filling with fluid. She told us our options. And then we asked her what she would do if it was her dog. By 6 he was gone. He died in my…
Read MoreA Dad’s Words: It’s just Different
We headed over to the ribbon cutting. Less than a mile away. Through the neighborhood and onto the new road. You could see the firetruck waiting to spray the kids from our house. Teenagers in band uniforms, unloading their instruments, waiting to play some upbeat song. I was on my bike, surrounded by a dozen kids. Almost all boys. Sawyer and his friends. Ages ranging from 5 to 13. They were talking about the free ice cream. Apparently that is the draw to get people to come out on a…
Read MoreThe Handwriting on the Wall…
I walked into the playroom and realized James found the ONE marker that wasn’t tucked away in the closet with the other messy villains like glitter and Play-Doh that are only allowed supervised play dates. He had written his name in large purple letters underneath his big sister’s artwork. When he realized I was standing there, he proudly announced, “Tahdah!” with his charming little smile. While my initial reaction was frustration and to grab my magic eraser, it was quickly replaced with the reminder that not very long ago I…
Read MoreSeverely Autistic Boy Handcuffed after School Allows him to Wander Off
Trevor Hibbert, a California father says he is planning legal action after his severely autistic son was found and handcuffed by police almost a mile away from his middle school. These stories are in the news almost daily now. I’m not sure if that has to do with the rise of social media, news outlets looking for a good story, or if this sort of thing is new. But I can tell you as a mom, they terrify me. And I can tell you as a blogger who shares these…
Read MoreWhat if he has Autism Mama
You were sitting on the living room floor trying to build a tower with your Legos. At six years old you looked like a teenager sitting there. Your baby face is completely gone. Your legs are getting long. Your hair so blonde and eyes so brown. The baby was all over you. On your legs. In your lap. Pulling at your toys. You kept rotating away from him. But he was onto you. You moved. He moved. I hear you yell, ‘Harbor! You wild baby!’ I looked up and you…
Read MoreBeing A Special Needs Parent Isn’t Something to Fear
I overheard two expectant mamas talking in a Chick-fil-A play area. They sat together on one bench, while their 3-4 year old boys played together, and they each were expecting a boy. I watched my own two boys play with these soon to be big brothers. These mamas chatted about pregnancy woes and pediatricians. And then the conversation took an unexpected turn. One of the mamas confessed that she’s constantly having fears that something will go wrong with the baby. It even keeps her up at night. What if her…
Read MoreWhy do I have to be ‘That Mom’
Why is it so hard to get services for our kiddos? Why do I feel that I am the only one who sees him? The real him. The fun, silly and loving him. Why do I have to annoy the school constantly….reminding them of who he is and how amazing he is? 4 weeks into school and every week (sometimes daily) it’s been something. He is not mean or aggressive….he is autistic and preverbal. He doesn’t understand what THEY want. He can’t communicate what HE wants. I’m saying what I…
Read MoreRegret, Remorse, Repentance
Every trip to the store ends the same way – with my son screaming and flailing on the floor. It is inevitable and without fail. It doesn’t matter what kind of distractions I use, what type of approach or discipline, he is a ticking time bomb, and within 15 to 20 minutes I will need to leave. It makes it impossible to finish any type of trip to the store or anywhere else really. I would be completely mortified when he screamed, eventually leaving the store in desperation with a…
Read MoreWhat if you have a Child with Special Needs?
We were married in the Lutheran faith and had to give up our precious weekend to attend a weekend of pre-marital counseling sessions. It was long and seemed completely unnecessary because we were madly in love. The class was centered on ‘deep’ questions that prompted discussion between couples. How would you handle a partner with an addiction? Or a partner that lies? A partner who gambles? We obviously didn’t have those problems since we were best friends so we breezed through. Oh the arrogance of twenty-something kids. Jamie and I…
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