September 29, 2025
Disability Shouldn’t Mean Lonely
My oldest son was diagnosed with severe nonverbal autism at age 3. In so many ways it felt like it changed everything.
Big things and little things.
Would he ever be able to talk?
Would he make friends?
Would he learn to drive a car? Go to prom? Have a job?
Would he ever live independently?
Goodness I worried. And wondered. About everything really.
His story had no clear answers.
He’s fourteen now. A teenager. A freshman at our local high school.
So many parts are as I predicted they would be after we heard the word autism for the first time.
Some are better. Some are harder. But mostly it’s just our normal.
Lately I have found myself longing a bit. It was Home Coming this past weekend.
I knew there was a parade and a football game. I glanced at the dress up days but Cooper opted not to participate in those. I saw photos of dance invites and dresses on my Facebook feed.
We had none of that.
But we did have something wonderful happen.
I hosted a picnic for families like ours on Saturday.
Our people gathered for pizza and fruit and connection. And laughter. So much laughter.
At one point I looked over and noticed Cooper was sitting next to his friend Dexter. Both are considered ‘nonspeaking’ but for different reasons. Both are autistic.
I watched them laugh. They were looking at Cooper’s phone. They were being silly.
I watched Cooper hug Dexter. And Dexter place his hat on Cooper’s head.
I couldn’t hold back my smile. And my tears.
Not once in fourteen years have I ever seen my boy be so present with a friend.
Goodness this parenting disability stuff is a rollercoaster. I won’t deny that.
But the good parts. There is nothing better.
I’m so thankful for this boy Dexter. He is such a good friend to my son.
Finding Cooper’s Voice is a safe, humorous, caring and honest place where you can celebrate the unique challenges of parenting a special needs child. Because you’re never alone in the struggles you face. And once you find your people, your allies, your village….all the challenges and struggles will seem just a little bit easier. Welcome to our journey. You can also follow us on Facebook.
