A Letter to My Boy on His Birthday


Dear son,

On the eve of your 4th Birthday, I want you to know that you are loved beyond measure plus infinity forever. Autism has nothing to do with the fact that I am blessed to be your Mama.

The love and joy that you have brought to my life is beyond anything I could ever have imagined. You make me smile EVERY single day.

When I saw you for the first time, I couldn’t believe how beautiful and perfect you were, and I feel the same way today.

You have climbed significant mountains these past years. It has not been easy.

Some times we hung on by a tiny thread but we hung on- and we will always make it through everything together.

We will continue to guide each other on this journey. I am so proud of your bright shining light, the way you rise to meet every challenge-waking up every single day happily smiling-despite autism and medical problems.

You are my hero!

I am in awe of the way that people are drawn to you. Your eyes twinkle and radiates from your kind heart.

I know the hardest and most frustrating thing for both of us is your lack of words. I know you have so much you want to tell me-so many stories and jokes.

I imagine your adorable little voice filled with excitement and curiosity as you ask me questions about the world.

I know and believe in my soul that it will happen, someday your words will flow. I yearn for that day!!

Regardless of what happens, where this journey takes us and the bumps in the road-please know this:

I will always believe in you. No matter what the doctors, teachers, or assessments say.

I will always walk with you. I may be in front clearing the way. I may be beside you, waiting and ready to hold your outstretched hand.

I may be behind you-ready to catch you when you fall. But I guarantee I will be there; you can count on it!

I will always push you to do more, to be more, to exceed limits and to reach your full potential. I want you to be the best version of yourself.

I want you to “be you” with no consequences from others.

I will never allow Autism to define you or us. You are so much more than any diagnosis.

You are brave and smart. You are adventurous, curious and funny. You love lights, music and books. You are a son, brother, cousin, nephew, grand son and friend.

I will always be your voice. When your 4, 44, or 64- I will continue to ensure that your needs are being met. I will advocate for you as long as I live.

I will always try to teach others about Autism. I will always lead by example and teach you about kindness, patience and understanding.

We will continue to love people hard and to show others that love doesn’t need words.

I will always make sure we live our best life. We will have fun and always laugh. There will be endless dance parties, swimming, ice cream sandwiches, grand adventures and I will always spin and blow you kisses at bedtime.

I will always celebrate you and your success. We will celebrate every small step, giant leap and your hard work. We will party when you eat a pea or wave goodbye.

I will always protect you and your heart. I will battle anyone who bullies you, is mean to you or doesn’t act in your best interest.

I will always make sure that you know every day that you are loved. I will love you harder on the bad days. I will love you through meltdowns and tears, even when you think it is impossible to love you.

I cannot wait for more stories, more adventures and to climb more mountains.

Happy 4th Birthday my sweet boy. You are my heart!

Love Mom

Written by, Chrystal Venator

My name is Chrystal Venator. I am a proud wife, ASD Mom, and Step-Mom. In January 2017, at 21 months my son was diagnosed with Autism Spectrum Disorder. He is four years old and non-verbal. Since his diagnosis, I have become a full time stay at home Mom. I am 1000% focused on raising autism awareness and helping my son live a full and fun life. Follow our journey on Facebook at Stalen’s Way.

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Kate Swenson

Kate Swenson lives in Minnesota with her husband Jamie, and four children, Cooper, Sawyer, Harbor and Wynnie. Kate launched Finding Cooper's Voice from her couch while her now 11-year-old son Cooper was being diagnosed with autism. Back then it was a place to write. Today it is a living, thriving community of people who want to not only advocate for autism, but also make the world a better place for individuals with disabilities and their families. Her first book, Forever Boy, will be released, April 5, 2022.

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