Posts Tagged ‘wandering’
What Color Shirt Was He Wearing?
The scariest moments of my life happened tonight. On a Monday in November. A normal day. A dark night. Not too cold. Sawyer left the house to play at 4:17 pm. I didn’t pay attention to what he was wearing because I was unloading the dishwasher and feeding the baby. We had just finished an argument about Pokémon cards. I told him he couldn’t take them out of this house. He disagreed. I yelled. He yelled back. So honestly, I breathed a sigh when he left. Silence. It had been…
Read MoreThe Worry is Nonstop
We were sitting with the realtor about to discuss what we were looking for in a new home. I know she wanted to know about bedrooms and bathrooms and location. I didn’t care about that stuff. Not really. In the grand scheme of things that stuff wasn’t a priority. “We can’t be near a busy road. The house has to have a fence or the ability to add one BEFORE we move in. And most importantly, we cannot, under any circumstances, be near water. Non negotiable. I worry about windows…
Read MoreThe Fear of Wandering
Last night, I saw my sweet boy for the first time as a grown young man. My dream was so real. Until now, I really hadn’t been able to picture him outside of toddlerhood. I kind of blame that on autism. Maybe it’s the language barrier between us, or the discomfort of not knowing exactly what his future looks like. For some reason I just couldn’t picture him, or didn’t allow myself to try. He was big, taller than me. Happy and gentle. And strong. He clung tightly to my…
Read MoreThe Day I Lost My Autistic Daughter
It started off like any other Friday morning. I was rushing around trying to get 3 kids out the door for kindergarten drop off. There was a lot of “get your shoes on,” “are your shoes on yet,“ “that’s it we are leaving with or without the shoes.” Finally, after loading all 3 kids into the mini van we were off. I parked on Varian Way the same street we have parked on since my oldest son started school last year. The kids got out and we set off. Sadie…
Read MoreUnderstanding Social Norms
This afternoon I took Cooper and my baby for a walk. If you have followed me for a while then you know that my son is thriving. It’s obvious in my posts. I like to say we are all settling into autism. Me. My husband. Sawyer. And Cooper. Our whole family. We are all learning. We have calmed down. We rarely get shocked anymore. And Cooper is doing so great. We have started venturing out into our community. Daily. We keep trying. Pushing. But I never, ever take my boys…
Read MoreAutism and Wandering
It’s just after 11pm. My nonverbal autistic son is usually (and by usually I mean always) in bed (and by bed I mean on the floor behind the door of his room) by 8:45pm. Not tonight. Dawson has been impressing me with all of his newly founded abilities, which he performs independently. Putting his dishes in the sink. Putting his shoes away. Pulling his pants up when he is done with the restroom. Climbing on top of things to access what he feels he needs…you wouldn’t believe the type of…
Read MoreKeeping Autistic Children Safe (VIDEO)
Last week, a little boy, who is autistic and nonverbal, died. The story rocked the world of every parent who has a child with special needs. I shared a few updates as it was unfolding and was saddened to see the hate that emerged. Some comments were curious. Many were confused how this could happen. And everyone was heartbroken. I want you to know I know nothing more than you do. I know what I see on the news. That is it. But what I do know is the seriousness…
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