Posts Tagged ‘special needs siblings’
They Have A Story to Tell Too
I have three sons. Most of you know Cooper. He has two younger brothers. A lot of folks ask about them. They want to know why I don’t share them more. Some are asking sincerely. Some equate photos on Facebook to love. Letting me know that I love my other two children less than Cooper. I don’t feel that’s true but what do I know I guess. I’m not expert in parenting, that’s for sure. Sawyer is 7 and Harbor is 2. They are both exhausting and amazing at the…
Read MoreOur Favorite Time of the Year
These three picked out the absolute best tree at the tree farm today. It was an experience I tell you. As it typically is with these three. The baby found mud. Then we lost him for a second. He was hiding. Sawyer wanted every tree. Cooper didn’t care what tree…he just needed ‘A’ tree in the back of truck. Jamie didn’t swear or yell once! No one threatened to call Santa! And after we went for doughnuts. But they were out of sprinkle doughnuts so it was quite a negotiation…
Read MoreShielding Them From the Dark
As the parents of a daughter with significant special needs, my husband and I have always tried to shield our two sons from some of the darker realities of Lizzy’s issues. Still, we remain as open as possible so they can feel close and connected with her and her care. If that sounds as if it might be impossible to accomplish, it is. Four years ago, I realized what a fool’s errand it was. Our oldest, Tom, was 17, and was mowing the lawn. Joe and Lizzy were also in…
Read MoreHe’s My Brother
These two had it out last night. Like brothers have been known to do. It was over an iPad. There was a truck involved too. Lots of screaming and wrestling. They were eventually separated. One was put in the bath and told me the whole story, nonverbally of course. He asked for hugs and kisses as his alligator tears filled the tub. The other one, the tough guy, he didn’t need a hug or a kiss. But he did tell, and by that I mean yell, his side of the…
Read MoreDear Sawyer
Dear Sawyer, You are seven and I am writing down the stories I want to share with you when you are a grown man. So you know about our secret world. Last night I went to your bedroom to tuck you in but you weren’t there. So, I made my way to your older brother Cooper’s room and saw you holding him. It brought tears to my eyes. The protective way you were holding him was beautiful. He’s been driving you bonkers lately. He has this desire to be near…
Read MoreThank You For Always Having Your Brother’s Back
To my eldest son, On Monday you asked, “Mummy what is autism like?” I told you my answer, and we sat and watched an animated explanation, showing how your brother sees the world differently to you. As I waited outside the school gates for you yesterday, you saw us and came running up with your arms held wide. “Hello, Rhys” you said, taking your brother’s hand in yours. The cars flew by us on the busy road, and you mentioned the noise and how scary it must be for Rhys,…
Read MoreThe Autism Bomb
Halloween brings back memories… A lesson in labeling our children with special needs. I believe this was just four years ago when peanut was eleven years old and her brother nine. This year it was just us four celebrating the holiday and the kids and I were trick or treating only a few houses down from where I am sitting as I write these words. I was not physically far from them, because I physically do not leave her side for very long, even back then. Always keeping an eye…
Read MoreH-O-M-E
Cooper has been living his best life and getting spoiled at his grandparents for a few nights. Three sleeps to be exact. I FaceTimed a dozen times but talking on the phone isn’t his jam. He’s a man of few words. On day one and two he didn’t think twice about his brothers and parents. He was too busy. But on day three, he started asking for m-o-m and h-o-m-e. I guess every five minutes around the clock according to grandma. When he got home today he gave me the…
Read MoreThe Side I Don’t Share
This is a mom on the verge. A mom completely out of patience, and it’s nowhere near noon, on Halloween, in a pandemic…so the magic is up to me – a mom who does NOT have the energy needed to make today memorable. I’ll somehow muster little sparks, because I always do, because I have to, because if I don’t, the darkness will swallow me whole. I’m not allowed to say how freaking hard it is to be a mother to an autistic 4 year old. Because it’s up to…
Read MoreA Gift I Will Never Take For Granted
I will never get over the gift of communication. Something so many take for granted. My newly two year old just told me he had an owie on his foot. He sat down. Took his sock off. And pointed to his injury. To so many outside the world of autism, this may sound so simple. His older brother is 9, nearly 10, and we work nonstop on communication of pain. For years, my sweet boy had ear infections that we didn’t know about. We didn’t know if his shoe was…
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