Posts Tagged ‘joy’
We Are More
You must be sad… I’ve heard that phrase a few times over the past couple weeks. You must be sad your son rides the shorter bus… You must be sad he’s not in the gen ed room at school… And the zinger, the one I felt like a shot was fired and received, you must be sad you will never have a normal life… These statements, they don’t necessarily come from a place of hate or anger. They come from a place of misunderstanding. They simply don’t understand. I am…
Read MoreWhat Brings Him Joy
I think a lot about the things that make this kid happy. And bring him joy. Because for a lot of years, the list was pretty small. It’s gotten bigger though, thankfully. If I was to build a world for him, one that was entirely for him…what would it look like? Well, it would be full of color. Bright reds and blues and yellows. Our clothes would all be bright too. Our houses and the objects inside as well. Music would always be playing. Happy, fun, LOUD music. We would…
Read MoreCooper’s Treasures
See these things in my son’s hands? Most would probably call it junk. Or even garbage. To my son…it’s treasure. It’s nine pieces of construction paper. Two pages from a calendar. Four pages from a train guide book. 11 pages from a vintage train magazine. 12 empty DVD cases. These are his things. I told him to get ready for speech. He grabbed the necessities. They go everywhere we go. They go to the bathroom and to his bed. From couch to floor. They eat dinner with us. And if…
Read More‘I Hear You Happy’
Cooper, Last night you were upstairs with your brother. It was long past your bedtime…which for Sawyer isn’t strange. That kid would stay up all night long. But not you. You have an internal alarm that tells you when it’s 9 pm and it’s game over. Up to bed you go with seven blankets and a pile of treasures so high it takes you two trips up the stairs. But last night was different from some reason. I heard your sounds first. Laughing. Squeals. Little screams. Hums. Giggles. You are…
Read MoreIs My Son Happy?
‘Everyone has a different idea of what happiness looks like.’ Is my son happy? I think about that a lot. As do many parents of children who struggle to communicate. Who can’t show us. For a lot of years I honestly didn’t know the answer to that question. At age five my son didn’t laugh or smile much. He didn’t enjoy leaving our house. At home, he isolated himself a lot. He didn’t play or interact really. He was full of anxiety, only we didn’t know because anytime we asked…
Read MoreSomedays, It’s Hard to Find the Joy
“I wish my son was happy all the time like Bubba.” As I read those words, my heart instantly began to race. My stomach started twisting in knots. I’ve heard these words before. And although well intended, I couldn’t help but think to myself…Is that how people think he is ALL the time? If so, then I’m doing something wrong. I’d be doing a disservice to you, my family and the autism community if all I talked about was the positive. I created this space, this community, to inspire others…
Read MoreAutism is Joy. So Much Joy.
Autism. It’s not glamorous, easy, or fun. It’s cancelling plans you’d been looking forward to, and not wanting to explain because you don’t want pity or sympathy… Or even worse…someone acting like they understand something that you have to live to grasp. It is size 7 diapers at three and a half, and fearing having to put your squishy cheek little boy in adult diapers. It’s baby gates, high chairs, and it’s closed top cups. It is toys still in boxes because your son would rather spin the wheels on…
Read MorePlease See The Whole Picture
I share a lot of our struggle. I need it to be seen. It cannot be the part of autism that gets ignored to make others more comfortable. And I feel like so much of severe autism gets minimized. It has to have a voice! I don’t just want people to be aware or accept, I want you to be a voice, an advocate and see the whole picture. You have to see the dark, because it is there whether you want to see it or not. However, with that…
Read MoreEvery Single Day I Choose Joy
I read a comment today from a follower who said I was glossing over the hard parts. I’ve been thinking about it all day. It’s a funny comment from where I’m sitting actually. Most people tell me I’m too negative. They find the realities of my world to be depressing. Even though they are indeed, the realities of so many. Here is what I will tell you. I’m not glossing over the hard. It’s here, right under the surface. Always ready to creep in. And at any moment, if I…
Read MoreWe Choose Joy, But That Doesn’t Mean It Isn’t Hard
This morning Jamie and I sat on the loveseat together at 7 am drinking our coffee. Side by side. We were smooshed in. Cooper had the other couch to himself. He sat dead in the center with his treasures spread out around him. On one side were photos. To us they appear random. To him they are everything. On the other side meticulously arranged is a flyer for a local realty place, a Barney DVD case, a Pet the Cat book and the DVD, Blue Mountain Mystery. Jamie and I…
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