I called my mom and cried today. I haven’t cried in quite some time over all of this. I was able to get out of the house alone and run some errands and as I was driving I finally broke down crying. I have been holding it in for a few days and it just got to be too much. The day-to-day with Cooper is so hard. Let me rephrase that. If we let Cooper do whatever he wants life is easy. If we challenge him all hell ‘can’ break loose.…
“It’s not humanly possible that you hate everything Cooper. Unless, you aren’t human and you were sent to this earth to make me insane. Then, I guess yes, it might be possible.” Then I looked deep into his eyes to see if maybe he was indeed an alien. Nope. No sign. This is something I said to Cooper yesterday on the way home from his first occupational Therapy appointment. Let me remind you that this place is amazing and the therapist is an angel. An actual angel. She had the…
I can’t do it. I can’t make myself physically pick up the phone and call for this service. Life is not fair. I can’t do another evaluation. I don’t want him to need special ed. What else can I add onto that…How about put a damn email address on here so mom’s like me don’t have to make initial contact with a phone call. Ease me into it as they say.
I mentioned yesterday that my whole family is sick with a cold….including one of our dogs. I think our house should be quarantined at this point. The boys stayed home from daycare with Jamie and he text me around 10 that something ‘questionable’ was draining out of Cooper’s right ear. First, I am not surprised. He has been acting like a lunatic lately. I wish he could just tell us when something hurts. I hate the thought that he is in pain and I don’t know it. Second, what next? And…
I am sitting here trying to decide what to write about. I could write about the event I went to this weekend and how seeing hundreds of ‘normal’ happy children takes a lot out of me. How I had to text Jamie a few times for support and yet again realized how alone I am in my feelings about Cooper’s future. He will never feel how I feel about our situation. And I will never feel how he feels. Maybe its a man/woman thing. Or an outlook on life thing. I guess…
I have to share this! Cooper had a cold yesterday. I am kind of worried that he might have an ear infection which would mean that his tube most likely fell out. Ugh. I can’t even think about it. It seems to be gone today though. Anyhow, I picked him up from daycare and for the first time in 2 years we rode home in silence. Usually, he ‘chats’ the whole ride. It borders whining with a bit of pointing and shrieking. Oh, to know what is in that kid’s…
Cooper’s sensory issues really intimidate me. I think because they don’t make sense to me. I can’t seem to get a grasp on it either. And, they are pretty much invisible. He is an angel for teeth brushing, getting dressed, etc. The kid just can’t sit still. He can’t shut it off. I’m really thinking Occupational Therapy is going to help. I’ve read raving reviews from other parent’s and am SO hopeful. Looking back at this journey I have to chuckle at all the different stages that were hard at first and…
We had Cooper’s Occupational Therapy Evaluation yesterday morning. I am wearing my new positive hat (AKA…The ‘I am going to positive if it freaking kills me’ hat) and there were many ‘good’ things that came from the evaluation. First, this lady is A-MAZ-ING! If you could pick the exact person you would want to work with your child it would be this woman. She is patient and sweet and knew exactly how to work with Cooper. We have had people in the past that didn’t know how to handle him…
