Posts

Choose Kindness

December 10, 2020

When do we learn hate? At what age? It’s a question I’ve been thinking about for days now. I share these three boys and our family on Facebook. I do it for a few reasons. I want to normalize autism. I want to remove the stigma and fear from the word. I want to show the possibility. The reality. The hope and the joy. I want to educate the person who knows nothing of disability. So when they meet a child or adult like my son, they give grace. And…

Ten Years Old and Nonverbal

December 10, 2020

Nonverbal communication is a pretty amazing thing really. My son Cooper communicates mostly with sounds: Think grunts and squeals and gasps. He points a lot. And brings things to us and brings us to things. He places his hands on ours and guides them in certain ways. He touches our lips and uses his hands to turn our faces to see things. He uses his iPad to show us pictures or videos of things he wants to tell us about. He does some typing. But only words that are important…

The ‘Why’ of Nonverbal

December 10, 2020

I catch myself staring at my son and drifting off to another place.  In this place I think of what his voice would sound like. I think of what it would sound like if he could call me Momma.  Over these past few years, I’ve realized time has stood still. My son has progressed into an older version of himself. He looks older…but some parts haven’t progressed. He should be telling me no, yelling at his sister as he chases her around the house and telling me what his favorite…

When All Else Fails, Ask For Help

December 10, 2020

Helpless. Desperate. Inadequate. These words describe how I feel as the mother of a child with limited verbal abilities who is inexplicably wasting away before my eyes, refusing to eat and unable to tell me why. Evie is my five-year-old daughter on the Autism spectrum, and she’s been thriving in Kindergarten this year, making progress in many areas despite the mess Covid has made of things. How is it possible that a problem like this can pop up so suddenly and coexist among all these milestones we’re meeting? We’ve put…

What Does it Mean to be Grateful?

December 10, 2020

What does it mean to be grateful? I think gratitude can look different for each individual person. We all want a happy life. Some people may be grateful for a good job and financial stability. Others may be grateful to be a stay at home parent, raising and watching their children thrive and grow. Gratitude is a powerful human emotion. In its simplest form, gratitude refers to a “state of thankfulness” or a “state of being grateful.” Thanking others, thanking ourselves, gratitude in any form can enlighten the mind and…

Mamas who are in the Grief Stage; it is okay

December 10, 2020

Why would you feel grief over autism? Your child is alive.  They are healthy, even happy most of the time.  It could be so much worse they say.  I have said those words to myself as well as had others say them to me. It does little to bring you comfort in the darkest corner of your mind. All it really does is make you feel guilty and believe me we feel an insurmountable amount of guilt already.  The guilt can be even worse than the grief. I could tell you…

I Wanted to Tell Her It Would Be Okay

December 9, 2020

It was a warm sunny day in the middle of June. We were, and still are in the midst of a pandemic. We live in southwest Florida so the June days can become unbearable at times. I was almost 7 months pregnant with a very crazy 1-year old little girl. My husband and I decided to take her to the pool to cool off and have her burn off some of her energy. We live in a little community, filled predominantly with retirees. We are one of a few families…

Age is Literally Just a Number

December 8, 2020

Today I find myself decluttering. It usually makes me feel quite a bit better…when I’m in one of those random funks. But if nothing else, today’s chore left me feeling more gloomy than anything. I first tackled the hall closets, our makeshift office in the spare bedroom, and then turned my attention to Beckett’s room. Truth be told, there isn’t much going on in our son’s room..to declutter, or otherwise. Of course, he has a sturdy, nice bed, complete with ladder and slide. There are various decorative pieces on his…

Can You Feel My Vibe?

December 7, 2020

My son, who was diagnosed with Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD), was also diagnosed with Sensory Processing Disorder (SPD). As part of his profile, he has a heightened sensitivity to light, sound and the energy of his environment. To navigate loud places, or areas that have unexpected sounds, has been challenging. We found bright lights could be over stimulating, making movie theatres, fairs and arcades unpredictable. He would become so revved up, literally bouncing from one thing to another, and his impulse control was non-existent. He also became disregulated by itchy…

I am a Forever Mother

December 7, 2020

All five of my kids have really peculiar teeth. Which is kind of ironic, seeing as my husband is a dentist. Missing laterals, crowding, odd bite patterns—we’ve got it all. My son Jack has what is called a class three underbite, which means his lower jaw comes out much further than it should. He’ll probably need to have a lot of teeth pulled. And there is a surgery to correct the whole thing. It is big and long and complicated, with a very difficult recovery. We could never put him…