My Son Saves Me Everyday

I want to tell you about a boy.
He is ten years old and his name is Sawyer.
In my book I say he saved me. The story goes onto share how my heart stopped beating during active labor with him.
I came back for him. So he would be okay. I knew he needed me to live for him. But it’s more than that.

He’s saved me countless times since then.

I spent the last 72 hours with hundreds of moms. Moms like me.
And Sawyer stood by my side.
He’s always been part of the autism world. And the special sibling world. He knows and loves so many kids like his brother.
But the moms. He’s never been in a room with that many before.
He charmed.
He chatted.
He helped.
He gave hope.
And he brought so much delight to women who see their own kids in him.

He feels like sunshine. And I swear every single person told me how wonderful he is.

He found me yesterday after my speech. I had scanned the crowd for him while I was talking but couldn’t see him. I figured it was boring listening to me talk.
But that wasn’t the reason he wasn’t there.
As I walked towards the back of the room he appeared, grabbing my hand.
‘I didn’t realize you worried so much mom. About me. When I was little.’
He wiped his eyes as he said it. And I smiled at first because to me, he still is little. He’s still my little boy.
‘I thought you just worried about Cooper. Mom, I’m sorry I didn’t know. I was happy mom. You didn’t have to be sad back then.’
Sometimes, the things we worry the most about have a way of turning out perfectly. It just happens when you are busy surviving.
‘I got you a necklace mom. From Kendra Scott. While you were talking.’

He saves me everyday.

Finding Cooper’s Voice is a safe, humorous, caring and honest place where you can celebrate the unique challenges of parenting a special needs child. Because you’re never alone in the struggles you face. And once you find your people, your allies, your village….all the challenges and struggles will seem just a little bit easier. Welcome to our journey. You can also follow us on Facebook.
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Kate Swenson

Kate Swenson lives in Minnesota with her husband Jamie, and four children, Cooper, Sawyer, Harbor and Wynnie. Kate launched Finding Cooper's Voice from her couch while her now 11-year-old son Cooper was being diagnosed with autism. Back then it was a place to write. Today it is a living, thriving community of people who want to not only advocate for autism, but also make the world a better place for individuals with disabilities and their families. Her first book, Forever Boy, will be released, April 5, 2022.

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