Permission to Pause
This motherhood stuff is tough sometimes. Like cry at 3 am tough when your sweet baby refuses to sleep. But a friend of mine, Carrie Cariello, told me the most beautiful thing this weekend. And I can’t stop thinking about it.
We were on a panel. Me, her, and our friend Jackie.
We were asked what advice we would give to parents of newly diagnosed kids. It a pretty common question. I spoke of pausing. Not rushing through. Taking time to process and feel the big feelings and sit in the dark for a bit. And then finding other parents who understand. That’s what I wish I would have done in those early years.
Her response was a bit different. Unexpected really. And it shook me.
See she is in a different season than me. Her kids are older than mine. Teenagers! Some even leaving for college. (Go Jack!) She is passed the diapers and teething and the breastfeeding. We are both mamas just at different stages.
Her advice to those tender hearted parents of newly diagnosed kids…
Smell their heads. Let them have a cookie before dinner and stay up late. Kiss them. Hug them. Squeeze their cannelloni thighs. Because it goes so fast.
‘I would do it all over again. Even my hardest autism days. Just to have more time with my son.’
And I sobbed. Because I would too. My Cooper is 11 years old. Almost a teenager. And I don’t want it to be over. I’m not ready to be done with babies and toddlers. I’m not ready for him to grow up.
Thank you Carrie for giving me permission to pause today.
Smell their heads. Squish their cheeks. Hold them while they sleep.
That’s my plan for the day.
Finding Cooper’s Voice is a safe, humorous, caring and honest place where you can celebrate the unique challenges of parenting a special needs child. Because you’re never alone in the struggles you face. And once you find your people, your allies, your village….all the challenges and struggles will seem just a little bit easier. Welcome to our journey. Follow us on Facebook, Instagram, and join our supporter page, Coop’s Troops, for an amazing community full of support and understanding