Waiting For Sister

Our fourth baby is due in 93 days. Not that I’m counting or anything.

Although pregnancy in your late 30’s during a pandemic and a Minnesota winter with three wild boys is no joke.

I’m trying to enjoy it. And I am. But tick tock over here.

Yesterday, as I was attempting to sneak a few minutes of alone time midday, my two older boys made their way into my room. They always find me.

Sawyer pulled up a pillow and a blanket next to me and began watching a show on his iPad. Within seconds he asked me if baby sister was kicking. His hands were all over my belly in attempts to feel her. He’s quite sure that everything he feels is her ‘butt.’ Which leads to the wackiest questions.

He’s also very concerned about the stretch marks on my stomach. He wants to know if they hurt and if I’m sad that my tummy looks the way it does.

As we were chatting, I noticed Cooper sitting on the chair next to my bed, watching us. With some coaxing I was able to get him to feel my stomach. I want to be clear this is a big deal. Cooper isn’t one for trying new things. Or touching. Or babies.

But he did it. In his own way.

Not being one for personal space, he crawled right onto my lap and put his hands and face on my stomach.

He listened for a second. He waited. And then he was done.

The question I am most commonly asked is…’Does Cooper understand you are pregnant?’ Followed up with, ‘Is he excited?’

Because I ALWAYS presume competence, I will say yes, Cooper understands that he is getting a baby sister sometime in the future.

Does he understand that she is in my stomach…I’m not so sure. Although he does notice that it’s harder to fit on my lap once again.

And is he excited? Well, I am sure as the oldest brother he is thinking the same thing our 13 year old, grey haired, black lab is thinking….

NOT THIS AGAIN!

I am careful not to predict to much with Cooper because he always surprises me.

He’s not a ‘what you see is what you get kinda kid.’ Nope. He’s full of layers and complexities and keeps me guessing.

I remember the first time he acknowledged our third son. He was two days old and Cooper walked up and ran his fingers through Harbor’s hair. And then laughed and gasped.

It was amazing.

This time he will have a sister. Another tiny human to drive him crazy and pull the love right out of him.

I can’t wait.

Finding Cooper’s Voice is a safe, humorous, caring and honest place where you can celebrate the unique challenges of parenting a special needs child. Because you’re never alone in the struggles you face. And once you find your people, your allies, your village….all the challenges and struggles will seem just a little bit easier. Welcome to our journey. You can also follow us on Facebook, subscribe for exclusive videos, and subscribe to our newsletter.