4 Simple Words I Wish People Would Say Instead of “I’m Sorry”
With April being World Autism Month, I wanted to share something that’s been on my heart lately in hopes to help “Light It Up Blue.”
I can’t tell you how many times I have heard the words “I’m sorry,” since Jack was diagnosed with autism last year. I’ve honestly lost count.
First, I want to say that this is not to knock anyone or make them feel badly about how they react when they learn about a child who has special needs.
You see, prior to having my own child that is autistic, I most likely had a similar response: I’m sorry.
Frankly, I just didn’t know what else to say.
Secondly, you all know I share lots of stories, pictures and videos of our boy. I do this not only because I’m so very proud of him and how far he has come, but more importantly I share in order to raise awareness and acceptance of autism.
Our sweet Jack continues to leave me in awe of his abilities and strengths and I love sharing that with the world.
By raising awareness, my hope is to show special needs through a different light. To show that it’s not just about what the disability keeps him from accomplishing, but instead highlight what makes him unique, special and different.
With all of that said, let me get back to hearing those words when people learn that Jack has autism…
When I hear “I’m sorry,” not only does it get a bit awkward, but I usually find myself scrambling to explain just how amazing he is and assuring them that they really don’t have to be sorry.
Because of this, I came to realize that maybe most people just don’t know what to say when they hear this news, like I didn’t before having Jackie.
So, take it or leave it, but here is my bit of advice: instead of feeling or saying sorry when you learn of a parent having a child with special needs, I encourage you to respond with these 4 simple words:
“Tell me about them.”
Is that parent going through some HARD stuff right now, probably entering a whole new world they never imagined themselves in – this new world of special needs parenting?
Absolutely.
And sure, maybe they will want to vent and talk about just how incredibly stressful, overwhelming and confusing it all is. But hear me out; instead of apologizing to that parent, take a moment to ask about their child and find out a little more about them.
No matter what the child’s special needs are, I’m willing to bet that the parent sharing with you would LOVE to also share the amazing qualities that make their little one perfectly imperfect.
So entering this month of autism awareness and acceptance, I encourage you to ask those 4 simple words to parents that share with you that they have a very special little one in their lives:
Tell me about them.
I guarantee that you will learn about one very incredible little being.
Written by, Vanessa France
Vanessa France is a working mama of 4 children – ages 9, 8, 6 and 3. She’s a self proclaimed hot-mess mom trying her best to raise polite and happy humans all while documenting the beautiful, messy world of motherhood on social media. Vanessa works in Hospice full-time and runs her own skincare business on the side with Rodan + Fields, where she loves to share amazing products and a work from home business opportunity with others looking for more. You can follow Vanessa on Facebook, on Instagram, for her skincare line and on her website.
Interested in writing for Finding Cooper’s Voice? LEARN MORE
Finding Cooper’s Voice is a safe, humorous, caring and honest place where you can celebrate the unique challenges of parenting a special needs child. Because you’re never alone in the struggles you face. And once you find your people, your allies, your village….all the challenges and struggles will seem just a little bit easier. Welcome to our journey. You can also follow us on Facebook, subscribe for exclusive videos, and subscribe to our newsletter.
