Realizing How it Should Be…

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I had one of those ‘this is how it should be’ parenting moments this morning. I was able to bring my four-year-old to preschool today. We weren’t in a hurry and chatted as we drove. When we arrived, we walked in together. He took off his boots, hung up his bag and jacket and went and sat down and played. I spoke with his teacher, looked at his artwork and so on. And then I left. Sounds so simple, right?

I’ve never had an experience like that with my autistic son. He is a runner, a screamer, and an eloper. He doesn’t let me talk. Instead I chase. I smile. I try to over-accomodate. I prepare for the worst. I sweat. I get stressed.

And when I leave after drop off, I am exhausted, both emotionally and physically. I typically spend the day waiting for a phone call or a text. Often, holding my breath that nothing is wrong. Praying Cooper is doing okay and that today isn’t the day where I get dreadful news.

If you have a child with behavior challenges you understand. School and therapy isn’t all sunshine and roses.

And today, I felt what it ‘should be’ like. It was wonderful.

Take a listen.

https://youtu.be/P32stk3FreA

Finding Cooper’s Voice is a safe, humorous, caring and honest place where you can celebrate the unique challenges of parenting a special needs child. Because you’re never alone in the struggles you face. And once you find your people, your allies, your village….all the challenges and struggles will seem just a little bit easier. Welcome to our journey. You can also follow us on Facebook and subscribe to our newsletter.

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Kate Swenson

Kate Swenson lives in Minnesota with her husband Jamie, and four children, Cooper, Sawyer, Harbor and Wynnie. Kate launched Finding Cooper's Voice from her couch while her now 11-year-old son Cooper was being diagnosed with autism. Back then it was a place to write. Today it is a living, thriving community of people who want to not only advocate for autism, but also make the world a better place for individuals with disabilities and their families. Her first book, Forever Boy, will be released, April 5, 2022.

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1 Comments

  1. Jen on January 27, 2018 at 8:55 pm

    I have two boys on the spectrum and when people ask me what it’s like the first thing that comes to mind is always that everything is hard. It’s so hard, and occasionally one of them will do something like walk to the park with us with no issues and that feeling of not having a huge amount of anxiety gives me an overwhelming feeling of “this is how is should be,” and it’s great to have some moments where we’re all relaxed and it reminds me of how far they’ve come. It’s a blessing though really to not take anything that seems to come easy for granted. They really teach us so much. It’s great that you get to see things from two very different perspectives!