Trust in the Good

Today is my son’s third day of school. He is a fifth grader.

I get so scared sending him anywhere alone. But I have to trust. I have to trust in good and kind and grace.

I have to trust that people will know the yellow haired boys name is Cooper because he won’t be able to say it under pressure.

I have to trust that they will ask him if he wants a drink of water because he won’t think to ask.

I have to trust that they will wipe his mouth after he eats and adjust his waistband after he goes to the bathroom.

I have to trust that they will listen. And lead him when he needs to go somewhere. And hug him when he’s overwhelmed.

I have to trust that they see him and believe in him. And sit on the floor with him if he’s scared.

I have to trust because he can’t tell them if he’s hurt or if someone is mean to him.

I have to trust because today is his third day of school. He has been ready for hours. He packed his paper and his DVDs. He adores school.

He’s also excited that it’s going to rain today. He loves rain. We are going swimming on Saturday. And to Grandma’s cabin on Sunday. And it’s his dad’s birthday on Monday so we are having a party with cake, balloons, presents, decorations, and friends.

Parties are his favorite. And Lots and Lots of Trains is his most treasured DVD. It’s in his bag. And if he gets scared ask him about fire trucks. Or Dora the Explorer. She is his friend.

He would tell us all this stuff if he could. Like I used to do when I would write a paragraph about my summer. But he can’t. So I will his teachers and anyone who will listen. I will tell you. And I will trust. Trust in the good.

Please listen. Listen to his sounds and his signs and his hands. If he likes you he will hug you. And tease you. But you have to give him time.

He’s so excited.

Every time he leaves this house I say a silent prayer over his head as I hold him for as long as I can before he pulls away. He is growing up and has very little time for this lovey dovey stuff.

My words are simple…’Please God protect him.’

He’s not scared. But I am. I am not as brave him. I am not nearly as courageous. Moms and dads worry. But we learn to trust the world with our greatest gift because our children show us the way.

Be brave sweet boy. Keep believing in the world around you.

When he gets home he will ask me about his mail from Amazon by holding up 1 finger in the air. He loves mail. And Amazon.

Finding Cooper’s Voice is a safe, humorous, caring and honest place where you can celebrate the unique challenges of parenting a special needs child. Because you’re never alone in the struggles you face. And once you find your people, your allies, your village….all the challenges and struggles will seem just a little bit easier. Welcome to our journey. You can also follow us on Facebook, subscribe for exclusive videos, and subscribe to our newsletter.

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Kate Swenson

Kate Swenson lives in Minnesota with her husband Jamie, and four children, Cooper, Sawyer, Harbor and Wynnie. Kate launched Finding Cooper's Voice from her couch while her now 11-year-old son Cooper was being diagnosed with autism. Back then it was a place to write. Today it is a living, thriving community of people who want to not only advocate for autism, but also make the world a better place for individuals with disabilities and their families. Her first book, Forever Boy, will be released, April 5, 2022.

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