My Heart Isn’t Ready

I am so ready to have my fourth baby. The nursery is ready. The car seat is too. I can’t wait to kiss her and snuggle her. She can come any day now.

And yet, I can’t imagine not giving 100% to this one. While my two older boys don’t seem to need mama every second, this one does. They have friends and sports and trains and seems so grown up at times.

But this one, he’s my baby. My little buddy.

He asks for snuggles and uppies and kisses and bandaids. He always wants to play and my lap is his favorite place to sit.

He adores reading stories and will tell me he loves me a dozen times a day.

I know he is going to be the best big brother and hearing him talk about baby sister is adorable. But he is my baby and a part of my heart isn’t ready to let him grow up.

When I leave to go to the hospital he will be little. When I get home he will be so grown up. I know it. Because I remember it with my older two. They age overnight.

I know it will be great. I truly do. Our fourth and final baby to complete us. But I may shed a tear or two, which I will blame on hormones.

I wish I could stop time sometimes. Just for a bit. So I can smell his hair and tickle his tummy and memorize every part of him.

Finding Cooper’s Voice is a safe, humorous, caring and honest place where you can celebrate the unique challenges of parenting a special needs child. Because you’re never alone in the struggles you face. And once you find your people, your allies, your village….all the challenges and struggles will seem just a little bit easier. Welcome to our journey. You can also follow us on Facebook, subscribe for exclusive videos, and subscribe to our newsletter.