The “R” Word

Paige 5

Okay guys let’s talk about something…. The ‘R’ word.

You all know the word I’m talking about.

I want to ask you a favor…will you please erase this word from your vocabulary?

For me.

For my darling Oaklan.

For every other special needs family in our neurodiverse world.

So many people use the ‘R’ word as an off the cuff comment without a single thought to the long term effects it can have on someone.

But I’m here to tell you, every single time a special needs family member hears this word come out of someones mouth, we feel a huge sadness in the pit of our soul.

Let me tell you why…. it has a cruel, horrible dictation.

People use this disgraceful word when they are referring to something that they view as stupid, someone who they don’t like, someone who has done something wrong, someone who has made a mistake.

Every time you use that word, you are saying they are the ‘R’ word.

Well the meaning of this word actually describes someone who has a disability.

Therefore, every time people use this word, they are saying that in their view, our children who happen to have disabilities are ‘stupid, wrong, not liked, a mistake etc’.

And I’m here to tell you, my little boy is none of those things.

He is a magical little superstar who loves dinosaurs, trucks, cars and trains.

He is a kid who adores his family..he is so intelligent and he is the absolute light of my life.

He does have a disability.

He is neurodiverse.

And he is absolutely incredible…but he is NOT an ‘R’ word.

Please think about, how this would make you feel?

I ask from the bottom of my heart, please, please erase this word.

Written by, Paige Carter

I’m Paige from Adelaide, Australia. I am a Mumma to two beautiful children, Lacey (6 and NT) and Oaklan (2.5 and ASD L3) and a wife to my wonderful husband, Sam. Together we enjoy going on adventures whether it be camping, trips to the zoo or soaking up our beautiful summer sun at the beach, to name a few. 

Oaklan was diagnosed in October 2020 with severe autism and this inspired me to share our journey with the world. I want to spread knowledge and acceptance for those with special needs and advocate for a more inclusive world. You can find us on Facebook and Instagram at Oak For Autism. 

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Finding Cooper’s Voice is a safe, humorous, caring and honest place where you can celebrate the unique challenges of parenting a special needs child. Because you’re never alone in the struggles you face. And once you find your people, your allies, your village….all the challenges and struggles will seem just a little bit easier. Welcome to our journey. You can also follow us on Facebook, subscribe for exclusive videos, and subscribe to our newsletter.

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Kate Swenson

Kate Swenson lives in Minnesota with her husband Jamie, and four children, Cooper, Sawyer, Harbor and Wynnie. Kate launched Finding Cooper's Voice from her couch while her now 11-year-old son Cooper was being diagnosed with autism. Back then it was a place to write. Today it is a living, thriving community of people who want to not only advocate for autism, but also make the world a better place for individuals with disabilities and their families. Her first book, Forever Boy, will be released, April 5, 2022.

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