My Son was Assaulted and he Couldn’t Tell Me
A while back my son was kicked by a person that was supposed to be caring for him.
It happened one day and I didn’t find out until the next.
He came home from school like any other day.
He was happy. He was smiling.
He asked for a cookie and his Kindle.
We played. Had dinner. Took a walk and then a bath.
And he went to bed.
I had no idea he had been kicked multiple times at school that day.
The next morning I received a phone call.
One that no parent should ever have to receive.
A person came forward and said that they witnessed Cooper being kicked multiple times by a staff member.
He was lying on the ground when it happened.
He was protesting, upset about something.
The person who was supposed to be watching him and keeping him safe, kicked him.
I was notified the person was told not to come to work that day while they investigated.
The witnessing staff was interviewed.
One witness said it was one kick to the side. Another said it happened multiple times.
That as more than enough proof.
The person was fired immediately.
CPS was notified because a child had been assaulted. And they may or may not open an investigation.
I was asked if I had any questions.
I couldn’t speak let alone ask questions.
I want to be clear the school did everything right. I am not mad at the school. But good God I am furious and devastated that my vulnerable, nonverbal child was assaulted. And I didn’t know until the next day.
I couldn’t protect him. And he couldn’t tell me.
That night when Cooper got home from school I immediately grabbed him and burst into tears.
I apologized repeatedly for failing him.
He didn’t understand why I was crying. He accepted my hug and quickly asked for a snack.
I gave him one, then stripped his clothes off and checked him for bruises. I studied every inch of his body.
I found a large, ugly bruise on his calf. Was it from the kick? I didn’t know. I took a photo anyways.
He was fine. He was happy. Not scared. Not upset like me.
I’m telling you this story for a few important reasons.
One, thank God if you have a child who can communicate to you. If you have one that can tell you if something bad happened. If you have one that is able to understand safety, fear, and danger. Because so many of us don’t.
Two, my child goes to the best school. I love it and thank God every single day that he is able to go there. But as a parent, you need to remember, you can’t be with your child all of the time.
You need to do every single thing in your power to be as involved as you possibly can. Make noise. Ask questions. Text, email, call, show up. Get to know the people who care for your children. Get involved. Ask about policies and if staff are encouraged to speak up about questionable doings. Be that parent.
Three, there are bad people in this world. And they may be working with children. This person must have snapped. They must have gotten so frustrated by my son that they couldn’t control their anger. And they assaulted a disabled child. I’ll never know if he had assaulted Cooper before or if this was the first time. I’ll never know if he assaulted other children.
Pray that this person never works with children again.
Four, I need to live forever. I need to be with him every second. I need to know he is safe. And there is so much pressure in that…
I want to thank the staff member that came forward and notified the directors that my child had been kicked. I can’t even imagine what would have continued to happen if they hadn’t.
This is the reality for so many parents. A reality that very few understand.
Finding Cooper’s Voice is a safe, humorous, caring and honest place where you can celebrate the unique challenges of parenting a special needs child. Because you’re never alone in the struggles you face. And once you find your people, your allies, your village….all the challenges and struggles will seem just a little bit easier. Welcome to our journey. You can also follow us on Facebook, subscribe for exclusive videos, and subscribe to our newsletter.
