I Saw You Today

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I saw you today. In fact I saw several of you.

I was the mom picking up some groceries with my son.

My autistic son, that’s all he is. No need to walk on eggshells around us, we were just fine. But I’m not sure you were.

When he made unusual noises as I stood at the deli counter you were allowed to smile at me and say hello.

It would’ve gone a long way to put me at ease.

It wasn’t necessary to look past us as if we weren’t there or look startled when I saw you glancing over. I saw you.

As I pushed my cart past you with my stimming 15 year old you were the one who avoided eye contact and looked down. I saw you too.

Perhaps you forgot your manners?

I’ll you give you a pass this time because I told myself next time you will do better. I have faith in you.

You just weren’t sure what to do and I’ll even give you that too.

Hopefully, you will be a little less uncomfortable when you see us or another duo like us, out in the community because there most definitely will be a next time.

Please understand, I’m not mad, and I know anger is not helpful.

I’m just trying to take what felt negative and create a positive teaching moment.

Hey, if my unpleasant experiences can help to desensitize you to what autism can look like than I’m down!

I was trying to teach my son how to shop today and now I’m trying to teach you that it is ok to see us. 

We are just people.

My efforts deserved a high five and we did just that when we left as we headed to our next stop!

We all can do better.

Written by, Donna Lund

Donna is an autism mom from Pittsburgh, PA. She has two daughters and two sons, both sons on the autism spectrum. She writes about her experiences in the hopes to reach out to younger moms and let them know they will not only survive….they will thrive! You can find her blog on Facebook, or you can subscribe to her website.

Finding Cooper’s Voice is a safe, humorous, caring and honest place where you can celebrate the unique challenges of parenting a special needs child. Because you’re never alone in the struggles you face. And once you find your people, your allies, your village….all the challenges and struggles will seem just a little bit easier. Welcome to our journey. You can also follow us on Facebook, subscribe for exclusive videos, and subscribe to our newsletter.

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Kate Swenson

Kate Swenson lives in Minnesota with her husband Jamie, and four children, Cooper, Sawyer, Harbor and Wynnie. Kate launched Finding Cooper's Voice from her couch while her now 11-year-old son Cooper was being diagnosed with autism. Back then it was a place to write. Today it is a living, thriving community of people who want to not only advocate for autism, but also make the world a better place for individuals with disabilities and their families. Her first book, Forever Boy, will be released, April 5, 2022.

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