When Forever Hits You…

I just went for a run. My first run in years.

It was terrible. 85 degrees out. Sunny. No breeze.

I ran for 30 minutes. I didn’t stop. I cursed myself a few times. I’m 36. And I let myself get this out of shape. I used to run. I used to exercise. But then life got too hard. Too busy.

My legs felt like concrete. I was going so slow at times I waited for people to pass me.

But I did it. I didn’t make any excuses. Like breastfeeding. Or being too tired. Or too busy with work. I put my shoes on. Put my hair in a ponytail. And off I went.

Why you ask?

Because yesterday my autistic son had a meltdown at therapy. I was there. Harbor was there too.

He kicked. He hit a few times. He flopped. He launched his body. He rolled. I describe it as a 12 legged slippery octopus made of jello.

And it hit me. I need to do this forever. Not for the toddler years. Not for a short period of time. But forever. This is my life. My reality. I will need to be able to manage him. Even as a man.

And I’m getting older. And he’s getting bigger. I need to be strong. I need to be able to run, lift, carry, and move a hundred plus pound body. It’s not going to get easier either. Autism isn’t going away.

When forever hits you…like really hits you…you put down the doughnut or glass of wine or whatever and you make changes.

Here’s to forever friends.

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Finding Cooper's Voice is a safe, humorous, caring and honest place where you can celebrate the unique challenges of parenting a special needs child. Because you're never alone in the struggles you face. And once you find your people, your allies, your village....all the challenges and struggles will seem just a little bit easier. Welcome to my page!

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