Please Take the Time To Listen To My Child.

35b6430845c205be19bbe3f3b269eea7I read something on the Apraxia Facebook page that brought me to tears. I have voiced SO MANY of my worries about Cooper’s future ranging from school to bullying to interacting with others. And the worry doesn’t stop there. I want and need Cooper to be popular and loved. I want and need him to have friends and be successful in relationships. What mom wouldn’t want these things? I read a post on the Apraxia Facebook page that brought me to tears. I was just sick after reading it. It went something  like this (the mom is typing this):

I received a note home from my 8 year old son’s teacher that he pooped his pants in class. This is the 3rd time this has happened this year. I asked my son when he got home about it. He told me that he asks his teacher and she tells him that she can’t understand him so she won’t let him go. There is a specific way that students need to ask to use the bathroom and since he can’t do that he isn’t allowed to use the bathroom.

I can’t stop thinking about this. This boy already has a difference that sets him apart. His life is already challenging. He already has obstacles to overcome. And then to not listen to him. To not take the time to actually understand him! And to not let him go to the bathroom and he poops his pants. Talk about adding reasons to be teased and bullied. This is an extreme situation. I get that. But it scares me.

I commented on the post with something like, ‘march down to that school and give that woman a piece of your mind!’ And most of the comments mirrored my feelings as well. But, it took my breath away. These kids are special. They are sweet and kind and they can’t help their language delays. It’s not their fault.

Cooper is 3 right now and I can protect him but there is going to come a time when I can’t be everywhere. And this is true with any parent. But now imagine that your child can’t communicate to you what happened in his day. It’s a chilling thought. I need to know that there are people out there that will see him for who he is and love him. And protect him and be his advocate. He is sweet and smart and just needs a little more guidance than other kids. So my final plea…please take the time to understand Super Cooper. He is a pretty great kid.

Cooper Updates

photo 1Look at this cute picture! My heart is melting as I post it. Cooper decided this morning that he no longer wanted to sit in his booster chair for breakfast. He wanted to sit in a big person chair. Of course he had to be reminded every 30 seconds that he had to ‘stay’ in the chair! The little stinker can’t sit still.

Cooper has his evaluation tomorrow for Occupational Therapy. Per the Minnesota norm we have a blizzard coming tonight so I am hoping the evaluation still happens. Cooper’s speech therapy has been canceled for the month so we need to get rolling on some therapy here!

Other than that no news is good news. One thing I will add is that Cooper’s understanding is improving daily. Yay! And as a result his frustration is increasing. Boo! It freaks me out. This kid needs to start talking or we are going to have a ticking time bomb on our hands. It’s easy to manage at home but not out in the real world. Eek!

Avatar photo

Kate Swenson

Kate Swenson lives in Minnesota with her husband Jamie, and four children, Cooper, Sawyer, Harbor and Wynnie. Kate launched Finding Cooper's Voice from her couch while her now 11-year-old son Cooper was being diagnosed with autism. Back then it was a place to write. Today it is a living, thriving community of people who want to not only advocate for autism, but also make the world a better place for individuals with disabilities and their families. Her first book, Forever Boy, will be released, April 5, 2022.

Share this post:

13 Comments

  1. runningafterale on February 20, 2014 at 5:38 pm

    Good luck! I hope you guys can make it to your appointment. Cooper is adorable as usual!



    • Avatar photo findingcoopersvoice on February 20, 2014 at 5:40 pm

      Thanks lady! Catching these moving boys in pictures these days is getting tough. They are all action shots!



  2. lundquistclan on February 20, 2014 at 5:56 pm

    Good luck on the OT evaluation. I myself had an appt that was cancelled twice because of this awful MN winter. Finally happened last week so I hope yours can also. OT is fun for the kids and does so much for them. Cooper will love it. Good Luck



  3. Amber Perea on February 20, 2014 at 6:31 pm

    I totally understand your fears. I was babysitting a neighbor recently and he said, “I wouldn’t want to be Jp.” and I asked him why. He said, “Because he can’t understand you unless your yelling and he’s too loud.”

    The little boy is only a year older and will be going to the same school and share the same birthday parties as all of the neighborhood kids. Le sigh.



    • Avatar photo findingcoopersvoice on February 21, 2014 at 2:17 am

      Hey lady. Can I email you? I have a few questions…some about Jp and some about blogging.



      • Amber Perea on February 21, 2014 at 2:31 am

        For sure. 🙂



      • Amber Perea on February 21, 2014 at 5:17 pm

        I left it on a different post but it’s Amberperea@hotmail.com 🙂



        • Avatar photo findingcoopersvoice on February 22, 2014 at 1:29 am

          Thanks lady! What a day. I am going to email you soon.



  4. Laura Smith on February 21, 2014 at 3:23 am

    I saw that too and that is awful!!



  5. mummytohenry on February 21, 2014 at 8:56 am

    Firstly well done cooper! He looks very happy to be in the big boy chair at the table!!!
    And also how absolutely heartbreaking for the boy who pooped in class. I honestly nearly cried! The teacher should know better than to put him in that situation.
    My handsome little nephew has autism. Obviously different situation to cooper, but he has problems communicating. He’s just started full time school last year. My sister in law blogs about him quite a bit and it may be worth checking her site out. http://www.farmerfarthing.com x



    • Avatar photo findingcoopersvoice on February 22, 2014 at 1:30 am

      Thanks lady! I am going to check out her blog. Hope you are doing well!



      • mummytohenry on February 22, 2014 at 7:14 am

        Ah yes we are good thank you. Well I’m hoping we are, Henry’s had a temp last night and this morning so just got him snuggling in our bed now while the Calpol kicks in. They like to keep us on our toes don’t they! X



  6. April Ignacio on March 30, 2017 at 9:56 pm

    Every night I pray: God, please make her feel love and keep her safe for the rest of her life. Super simple super hard to get assurance from.
    Much Love
    A